WINDSOR, Friday, May 13th, 1864.
—Very fine and warm. My old boys Spencer and Arthur [FN: Then at Eton.] came to see me ; Nevy, not being well, could not, alas ! I had only a little time with them, but it was very nice. I went to St. George's : wonder whether or when I shall go to church there again. Saw Mrs. Wellesley afterwards for a minute. Wrote, wrote, wrote. My Fred sent me a dear little scratch, though we only parted yesterday at 4¼. And he has got one from me. I don't know when we shall next write to each other. The Prss. of Wales came at 1½ and we received her at the door. After luncheon the Queen sent for me to say good-bye, and I hope I shall never forget what passed. She came towards me with a beautiful Indian shawl and a jewel-case in her hands : kissed me, and gave them to me with many kind words about her regret that I was going, and her good wishes for me. She kissed me again and again, saying she thought and felt the more for me because I had no mother. The ornament she gave me was a beautiful amethyst locket bordered with pearls ; on it a little diamond cross. [FN: Alas ! stolen many years after (Note in original).] Speaking of the cross, she said, "It is an emblem of what I have to bear day after day," and added something which I cannot bear to put down here in words, but which sunk deep into my heart. I thanked her as well as I was able ; kissed her dear hand many times, and began to cry ! how could one help it ? I didn't wish to help it ; but went up to my room, and had it out. Then came good-byes to the Princesses, with whom was the Prss. of Wales playing a duet with Prss. Helena. All spoke kindly and said good-bye ; and 0 dear ! good-byes are sad matters.
. . . Now I have come home from a great family dinner and party at Devonshire House, to which I went with Papa : Gladstones and Talbots, and Grauntecoque [FN: I.e. "Granny" and "Aunt Coque," who lived together.] also coming. (N.B.—I must mention somewhere that Uncle W. has kicked up a gt dust by declaring in the House in favour of universal suffrage ! ! ! out-Brighting Bright. F., I grieve to say, is delighted.) This sounds very formidable ; but, except a few qualms, I didn't find it so. Everybody was very kind ; and perhaps I don't mind anything when Fred is with me.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
12May1864, My Last Regal Journey
WINDSOR, Thursday, May 12th, 1864.
—Very fine and warm. I am glad to have slept here [FN: I.e. Buckingham Palace.] once. Have managed a good deal of Court experience since my apptmt. Breakfasted with Prss. Helena and Co. and then got leave to go to Carlton Terrace. F. came as before ! A little tiresome trying on ; and Ld. Geo. Quin came his own self with a pretty little clock for me under his arm. After luncheon, F. and I went (with Atie. P.. and Ly. Louisa) to be photographed together by Mr. Window. I fear we shall look like fools. Then back to C.H.T. [FN: Carlton House Terrace, the Gladstones' house.]; then I plunged into a Royal carriage, joined Prss. and Co. at Paddington, and had my last regal journey. Am tired ! but very happy.
—Very fine and warm. I am glad to have slept here [FN: I.e. Buckingham Palace.] once. Have managed a good deal of Court experience since my apptmt. Breakfasted with Prss. Helena and Co. and then got leave to go to Carlton Terrace. F. came as before ! A little tiresome trying on ; and Ld. Geo. Quin came his own self with a pretty little clock for me under his arm. After luncheon, F. and I went (with Atie. P.. and Ly. Louisa) to be photographed together by Mr. Window. I fear we shall look like fools. Then back to C.H.T. [FN: Carlton House Terrace, the Gladstones' house.]; then I plunged into a Royal carriage, joined Prss. and Co. at Paddington, and had my last regal journey. Am tired ! but very happy.
11May1864, The Queen's Second Court
LONDON, Wednesday, May 11th, 1864.
—We all came up to London for the Queen's 2nd Court : a very small one, but very striking and imposing. It was held at Buckingham Palace. People may carp and sneer at the poor Queen for keeping on her mourning, but everyone must have thought her dress to-day most suitable and becoming. The gown was trimmed deeply on the skirt with crape, but was cut square, with white up to the throat ; long hanging sleeves. Her cap was Marie Stuart, showing her hair turned back, and with a row of pearls round the border ; broad white lappets reaching to the feet ; and she wore the Garter ribbon with a diamond brooch on the shoulder, a star, and a great pearl necklace in many rows. Altogether she looked just as a widowed Queen holding a State ceremonial ought to look. And it was beautiful to see her manner and her dear smile. The Princess of Wales looked terribly thin and pale, in deep black ; must be wretched at the reverses of the Danes, who have just lost Duppel. I had the honour of seeing the tiny Prince, [FN: Prince Albert Victor, afterwards Duke of Clarence.] the Queen sending for us to her room, where he was visiting her. A nice thriving-looking plump baby, with bright blue eyes, delicate features and pointed chin ; a nose that will be aquiline, I shd think, and a likeness to both parents. A very intelligent way of looking at one. He cried a good deal, poor fellow, being sleepy. At the reception, the D. of Argyll came and shook hands with me, saying very kindly, "I am so glad to have you for a cousin." After it, I had a snug visit in my room at B. Palace from At. C. and the girls. At. C. brought me a lovely little ring with a pearl cross. Then to Carlton Terrace, where I found Fred ; then pleasant talk with him ; a visit from C. Ebbett ; back to B. Palace for dinner with Prss. Helena, Ly. Carolina, and Emily. Then a grand concert, held by the Prince and Prss. of Wales. This was a dream of delight, though the music wasn't all good ! I sat with Papa for the 1st part, shooting F. before very long coming into the room, looking very nice in uniform, and peering about for me in vain for a long time. But at last I caught his eye ; and it was so very pleasant to see his dear face light up when that happened ! He got up to me after the 1st part. We ran through a tremendous tilt of congratulations. Saw At. Y. Was very, very happy. Slept at Buckingham Palace, attending on Princess Helena.
—We all came up to London for the Queen's 2nd Court : a very small one, but very striking and imposing. It was held at Buckingham Palace. People may carp and sneer at the poor Queen for keeping on her mourning, but everyone must have thought her dress to-day most suitable and becoming. The gown was trimmed deeply on the skirt with crape, but was cut square, with white up to the throat ; long hanging sleeves. Her cap was Marie Stuart, showing her hair turned back, and with a row of pearls round the border ; broad white lappets reaching to the feet ; and she wore the Garter ribbon with a diamond brooch on the shoulder, a star, and a great pearl necklace in many rows. Altogether she looked just as a widowed Queen holding a State ceremonial ought to look. And it was beautiful to see her manner and her dear smile. The Princess of Wales looked terribly thin and pale, in deep black ; must be wretched at the reverses of the Danes, who have just lost Duppel. I had the honour of seeing the tiny Prince, [FN: Prince Albert Victor, afterwards Duke of Clarence.] the Queen sending for us to her room, where he was visiting her. A nice thriving-looking plump baby, with bright blue eyes, delicate features and pointed chin ; a nose that will be aquiline, I shd think, and a likeness to both parents. A very intelligent way of looking at one. He cried a good deal, poor fellow, being sleepy. At the reception, the D. of Argyll came and shook hands with me, saying very kindly, "I am so glad to have you for a cousin." After it, I had a snug visit in my room at B. Palace from At. C. and the girls. At. C. brought me a lovely little ring with a pearl cross. Then to Carlton Terrace, where I found Fred ; then pleasant talk with him ; a visit from C. Ebbett ; back to B. Palace for dinner with Prss. Helena, Ly. Carolina, and Emily. Then a grand concert, held by the Prince and Prss. of Wales. This was a dream of delight, though the music wasn't all good ! I sat with Papa for the 1st part, shooting F. before very long coming into the room, looking very nice in uniform, and peering about for me in vain for a long time. But at last I caught his eye ; and it was so very pleasant to see his dear face light up when that happened ! He got up to me after the 1st part. We ran through a tremendous tilt of congratulations. Saw At. Y. Was very, very happy. Slept at Buckingham Palace, attending on Princess Helena.
10May1864, Shoppums Finds Lockets for the Bridesmaids
WINDSOR, Tuesday, May 10th, 1864.
—I went off to London by the 9.10 train ; got Miss Sewell's "Preparation for the Holy Communion" for Princess Helena on my way to Carlton Terrace, and got there about 10½. Talked trousseau-ums and saw my wedding presents (wonderful sound !). I must make a list of them elsewhere, they will take up too much room in my journal. But I will mention the prettiest, completest little writing-table in the world from my old Maid, and a pretty inkstand (quite his own choice) from Nevy. These will come very near my heart. My Fred turned up before long and we had "sweet converse." Also multifarious shoppums : I chose an onyx signet-ring for him, to come on Saty ; and gave him to-day a crystal locket with a scratchy bit of my hair in it, with which he was certainly pleased. Ly. Louisa came after luncheon, and took us both in the carriage to Mimpriss's, where, after gt cogitation, we chose lockets for the bridesmaids, six with small pearl crosses, six with small turquoise ditto. I paid Granny a little visit ; then to M. (he also coming there), and came back here for dinner.
—I went off to London by the 9.10 train ; got Miss Sewell's "Preparation for the Holy Communion" for Princess Helena on my way to Carlton Terrace, and got there about 10½. Talked trousseau-ums and saw my wedding presents (wonderful sound !). I must make a list of them elsewhere, they will take up too much room in my journal. But I will mention the prettiest, completest little writing-table in the world from my old Maid, and a pretty inkstand (quite his own choice) from Nevy. These will come very near my heart. My Fred turned up before long and we had "sweet converse." Also multifarious shoppums : I chose an onyx signet-ring for him, to come on Saty ; and gave him to-day a crystal locket with a scratchy bit of my hair in it, with which he was certainly pleased. Ly. Louisa came after luncheon, and took us both in the carriage to Mimpriss's, where, after gt cogitation, we chose lockets for the bridesmaids, six with small pearl crosses, six with small turquoise ditto. I paid Granny a little visit ; then to M. (he also coming there), and came back here for dinner.
09May1864, I Like Royal Travelling Excedingly!
WINDSOR, Monday, May 9th, 1864.
—Heavy rain in the morning : no sun all day. I left Osborne with all the "serrement de Coeur" that such a good-bye to a place full of associations can give. I daresay I shall never see it again. And I have had peaceful days here, amid the greenness and sunshine, and singing of birds : "golden hours," too, those two days that he was with me, and his dear letters to be treasured all my life. I like Royal travelling excedingly ! The crossing was pleasant though rather cold. Most of the time I spent capping verses with the Princesses and poor little Prince Leopold, who made great play with "To be or not to be." How the arrival at Windsor did bring to my mind my days of—doing what he asked me at Stafford House to do ! I was greeted by such a dear letter ; also a very charming one from old Nevy. The sight of Miss Cathcart ! who's who and what's what ! She had to rig me out for the evening, one of my boxes hanging fire. Ly. Biddulph dined, and chaffed me very unmercifully, but I didn't mind one bit. Dear Ly. Caroline congratulated me.
—Heavy rain in the morning : no sun all day. I left Osborne with all the "serrement de Coeur" that such a good-bye to a place full of associations can give. I daresay I shall never see it again. And I have had peaceful days here, amid the greenness and sunshine, and singing of birds : "golden hours," too, those two days that he was with me, and his dear letters to be treasured all my life. I like Royal travelling excedingly ! The crossing was pleasant though rather cold. Most of the time I spent capping verses with the Princesses and poor little Prince Leopold, who made great play with "To be or not to be." How the arrival at Windsor did bring to my mind my days of—doing what he asked me at Stafford House to do ! I was greeted by such a dear letter ; also a very charming one from old Nevy. The sight of Miss Cathcart ! who's who and what's what ! She had to rig me out for the evening, one of my boxes hanging fire. Ly. Biddulph dined, and chaffed me very unmercifully, but I didn't mind one bit. Dear Ly. Caroline congratulated me.
08May1864, No Chaperon, Heathenish
OSBORNE, Sunday after Ascension, May 8th, 1864.
—We had matins in the Council-room, an interval, and then Mrs. Bruce and I went to church for the Litany and sermon. We were late, and missed the chief part of the Litany ; and this was all my church-going, for there was no getting a chaperon in the aftn rain. Prss. Helena sent for me to play battledore and shuttlecock and we walked abt the house together. I read Trench on the Parables, but feel rather heathenish. We dined with the Queen. F. wrote a dear letter.
—We had matins in the Council-room, an interval, and then Mrs. Bruce and I went to church for the Litany and sermon. We were late, and missed the chief part of the Litany ; and this was all my church-going, for there was no getting a chaperon in the aftn rain. Prss. Helena sent for me to play battledore and shuttlecock and we walked abt the house together. I read Trench on the Parables, but feel rather heathenish. We dined with the Queen. F. wrote a dear letter.
07May1864, Poor Princess Helena
OSBORNE, Saturday, May 7th, 1864.
—Lovely spring weather. I have remembered that this is the 1st time for years that I have watched spring blossoming into summer, having always been in London. It is very nice that this wonderful year will have all this bright beauty connected with it. My letter came all right, enclosing certain verses that he repeated to me the other day : sad ones, but full of beautiful thought. They bring his voice to my ears. I sat out of doors part of the time with Prss. Helena, part of the time reading " Dynevor Terrace." Mrs. Bruce and I went to the Queen in the evening. I am much distressed about poor Prss. Helena who is cruelly overworked, the Queen having no notion how her mind and body are strained, and indeed having no one to take her place.
—Lovely spring weather. I have remembered that this is the 1st time for years that I have watched spring blossoming into summer, having always been in London. It is very nice that this wonderful year will have all this bright beauty connected with it. My letter came all right, enclosing certain verses that he repeated to me the other day : sad ones, but full of beautiful thought. They bring his voice to my ears. I sat out of doors part of the time with Prss. Helena, part of the time reading " Dynevor Terrace." Mrs. Bruce and I went to the Queen in the evening. I am much distressed about poor Prss. Helena who is cruelly overworked, the Queen having no notion how her mind and body are strained, and indeed having no one to take her place.
Monday, January 12, 2009
05May1864, Sweet Converse
OSBORNE, Ascension Day, May 5th, 1864.
—Heavy soft showers. F. came to breakfast ; then we had another little talk ; then he came to church with Mrs. Bruce and me : then again we had "sweet converse" till he had to go off with the messenger at 1½. Oh, ardent, overflowing lovingkindness is round us ! giving us these two days' happiness over and above, when already we were so very happy ! Life felt a little flat after he had vanished.
—Heavy soft showers. F. came to breakfast ; then we had another little talk ; then he came to church with Mrs. Bruce and me : then again we had "sweet converse" till he had to go off with the messenger at 1½. Oh, ardent, overflowing lovingkindness is round us ! giving us these two days' happiness over and above, when already we were so very happy ! Life felt a little flat after he had vanished.
04May1864, A Golden Day
Wednesday, May 4th, 1864.
—Grey and raining out of doors ; but what a "golden day" ! The Queen being so kind as to hold a Privy Council to-day, Ld. Granville brought Fred (who is his private secretary : have I ever said so ?) with him. And we had all the afternoon to ourselves, in the ugly little ladies' room, which will never look ugly to me again.
0 precious hours ! 0 golden prime !
The Queen and Princess Helena both saw him. I was let off a Royal walk and drive. He came to the Household dinner, after which Mrs. Bruce, Ld. Granville, a German maukin, and I were marched off to the Queen's drawing-room. But we got back in time to say good-night : he sleeps at Cowes, and comes here to breakfast. He brought me loads of kind letters to Papa, from dear Hagley neighbours, etc. Likewise a diamond betrothal ring.
—Grey and raining out of doors ; but what a "golden day" ! The Queen being so kind as to hold a Privy Council to-day, Ld. Granville brought Fred (who is his private secretary : have I ever said so ?) with him. And we had all the afternoon to ourselves, in the ugly little ladies' room, which will never look ugly to me again.
0 precious hours ! 0 golden prime !
The Queen and Princess Helena both saw him. I was let off a Royal walk and drive. He came to the Household dinner, after which Mrs. Bruce, Ld. Granville, a German maukin, and I were marched off to the Queen's drawing-room. But we got back in time to say good-night : he sleeps at Cowes, and comes here to breakfast. He brought me loads of kind letters to Papa, from dear Hagley neighbours, etc. Likewise a diamond betrothal ring.
03May1864, A Model Love Letter
OSBORNE, Tuesday, May 3rd, 1864.
—Among my congratulations this morning came, to my great astonishment, a love-lorn farewell in verse from a poor little man called P., who I had no notion cared about me ! I laughed till I nearly cried over it, and couldn't resist sending it to Fred, as a model for his further letters.
—Among my congratulations this morning came, to my great astonishment, a love-lorn farewell in verse from a poor little man called P., who I had no notion cared about me ! I laughed till I nearly cried over it, and couldn't resist sending it to Fred, as a model for his further letters.
02May1864, Springtide in My Heart
OSBORNE, Monday, May 2nd, 1864.
—The first day of really soft, balmy wind. A day with a great hole in it, for there came no letter from F., owing no doubt to the tiresome Sunday post. Mrs. Bruce, Gen. Grey, and I had a delightful drive to Carisbrooke Castle amid bright early verdure and blossoming fruit trees. Spring was never so much to me as it is now, when there is such an answering springtide in my heart.
—The first day of really soft, balmy wind. A day with a great hole in it, for there came no letter from F., owing no doubt to the tiresome Sunday post. Mrs. Bruce, Gen. Grey, and I had a delightful drive to Carisbrooke Castle amid bright early verdure and blossoming fruit trees. Spring was never so much to me as it is now, when there is such an answering springtide in my heart.
29Apr1864, Fourth Waiting Continues
OSBORNE, Friday, April 29th, 1864.
—Drove with the Queen, Prss. Helena, and Pr. Leopold to Ryde : 4 horses, equerry, 2 out-riders, and all very imposing ; but my Court bathing-feel has left me for good and all ! Poor little Prince Leopold was full of talk and cheerfulness, but his small thin face grew pinched with cold ; and I wished I cd take him into my arms and cover him warmly up. The Queen asked if F. wd come and see me at Windsor : I had no notion it wd be allowed : O how nice it wd be ! We played demure whist in the evening ; and I made 1 hideous blunder.
—Drove with the Queen, Prss. Helena, and Pr. Leopold to Ryde : 4 horses, equerry, 2 out-riders, and all very imposing ; but my Court bathing-feel has left me for good and all ! Poor little Prince Leopold was full of talk and cheerfulness, but his small thin face grew pinched with cold ; and I wished I cd take him into my arms and cover him warmly up. The Queen asked if F. wd come and see me at Windsor : I had no notion it wd be allowed : O how nice it wd be ! We played demure whist in the evening ; and I made 1 hideous blunder.
26Apr1864, First Letter From Him
OSBORNE, Tuesday, April 26th, 1864.
—Same brightness, but E. wind. I wrote 8 answers to congratulations ; all "thank you" in different forms. And I received my first letter from him : such a dear one ! grave and simple, like himself. It makes it all very real to me. What paper is it written upon but a Privy Council Office sheet, reminding me of the Garibaldi entry day ?
—Same brightness, but E. wind. I wrote 8 answers to congratulations ; all "thank you" in different forms. And I received my first letter from him : such a dear one ! grave and simple, like himself. It makes it all very real to me. What paper is it written upon but a Privy Council Office sheet, reminding me of the Garibaldi entry day ?
25Apr1864, First Letter to Fred
OSBORNE, Monday, April 25th, 1864. S. Mark.
—He came to breakfast, and we had a nice talk before he saw me off. It was horrid going away ; but as I came into the lovely blossoming country, full of spring greenness and the singing of birds, the sunshine around seemed to answer to the sunshine in my own heart ; and I think the fortnight here will have a brightness of its own. I just saw Ly. Jocelyn and Emily Cathcart on the landing-place. Mrs. Bruce met me very kindly on arriving. I wrote my first letter to Fred : 0 how strange that looks ! He won't expect it ; for I told him he shd write first ; but I thought he wd be feeling rather grim to-morrow. Mrs. Bruce and I dined with the Queen, the Princesses, and Prince Alfred ; Prince Leopold and Prss. Beatrice appearing in honour of Prss. Alice's birthday. The Queen was as kind as possible to me : saying as she kissed me, "I must congratulate you, but I must scold you a little too !" She shot my locket ! Asked who he was like, and talked some time to me after dinner.
—He came to breakfast, and we had a nice talk before he saw me off. It was horrid going away ; but as I came into the lovely blossoming country, full of spring greenness and the singing of birds, the sunshine around seemed to answer to the sunshine in my own heart ; and I think the fortnight here will have a brightness of its own. I just saw Ly. Jocelyn and Emily Cathcart on the landing-place. Mrs. Bruce met me very kindly on arriving. I wrote my first letter to Fred : 0 how strange that looks ! He won't expect it ; for I told him he shd write first ; but I thought he wd be feeling rather grim to-morrow. Mrs. Bruce and I dined with the Queen, the Princesses, and Prince Alfred ; Prince Leopold and Prss. Beatrice appearing in honour of Prss. Alice's birthday. The Queen was as kind as possible to me : saying as she kissed me, "I must congratulate you, but I must scold you a little too !" She shot my locket ! Asked who he was like, and talked some time to me after dinner.
24Apr1864, Visiting the Duke
LONDON, 4th Sunday in Easter, April 24th, 1864.
—Papa and he came after breakfast, and I went with them to Tennyson's Chapel, [FN: Was this at Archbishop Tenison's School in Leicester Square ?] where we received the Holy Communion together. May God's blessing of peace then granted us abide with us evermore ! It was so wonderfully happy praying for him then, and feeling he was praying for me. If only our whole lives may be so sanctified ! After the service we went to Devonshire House, where even the being taken to the Duke's study didn't much frighten me ! He kissed me very kindly. I also saw Ly. Fanny and Margaret Howard, Ld. Hartington, Ld. Edward ; and Ly. Louisa gave me a photogr. of the Duke, and one of Lady Burlington, [FN: Mother of Lord Frederick. She died before her husband succeeded to the Dukedom.] who must have had a look of Mamma. At 4½ I went with him and Ly. Louisa to Ly. Caroline Lascelles's, where I saw her daughter May, Lord and Ly. Chesham, and Ly. George Cavendish, who were all most kind.
—Papa and he came after breakfast, and I went with them to Tennyson's Chapel, [FN: Was this at Archbishop Tenison's School in Leicester Square ?] where we received the Holy Communion together. May God's blessing of peace then granted us abide with us evermore ! It was so wonderfully happy praying for him then, and feeling he was praying for me. If only our whole lives may be so sanctified ! After the service we went to Devonshire House, where even the being taken to the Duke's study didn't much frighten me ! He kissed me very kindly. I also saw Ly. Fanny and Margaret Howard, Ld. Hartington, Ld. Edward ; and Ly. Louisa gave me a photogr. of the Duke, and one of Lady Burlington, [FN: Mother of Lord Frederick. She died before her husband succeeded to the Dukedom.] who must have had a look of Mamma. At 4½ I went with him and Ly. Louisa to Ly. Caroline Lascelles's, where I saw her daughter May, Lord and Ly. Chesham, and Ly. George Cavendish, who were all most kind.
23Apr1864, Deepest Feeling of Happiness
LONDON, Saturday, April 23rd, 1864.
—He came to breakfast with Ly. Louisa ; after which he stayed with me till nearly one, again talking on serious subjects. He gave me the deepest feeling of happiness I have yet felt, in saying he should like to go with Papa and me to the Holy Communion to-morrow.
—He came to breakfast with Ly. Louisa ; after which he stayed with me till nearly one, again talking on serious subjects. He gave me the deepest feeling of happiness I have yet felt, in saying he should like to go with Papa and me to the Holy Communion to-morrow.
22Apr1864, Telling Mamma About It
LONDON, Friday, April 22nd, 1864.
—I had a long talk, a Sunday one, with him ; and he told me all his opinions that he thought I shd not agree with him about. I don't—but he has built his house on the Rock ; and I can't but trust him ! He dined with us, and we went to see "Henry IV" at Drury Lane, which was very delightful. The Dss. of Argyll came this morning ; and I believe now everybody knows it. Ly. Chesham sent me a beautiful ring. He brought me the locket with his hair in it, and I wore it to-night, hanging it to darling Mamma's little pearl chain. It felt to me as if I was telling her about it.
—I had a long talk, a Sunday one, with him ; and he told me all his opinions that he thought I shd not agree with him about. I don't—but he has built his house on the Rock ; and I can't but trust him ! He dined with us, and we went to see "Henry IV" at Drury Lane, which was very delightful. The Dss. of Argyll came this morning ; and I believe now everybody knows it. Ly. Chesham sent me a beautiful ring. He brought me the locket with his hair in it, and I wore it to-night, hanging it to darling Mamma's little pearl chain. It felt to me as if I was telling her about it.
21Apr1864, We Are Engaged
LONDON, Thursday, April 21st, 1864.
—A bright, serene day of inward and outward sunshine. We are engaged, and my doubts and fears have been all absorbed in the wonderful happiness and peace. "Full measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, doth He give into my bosom." I have got my 1st present : he brought it me this afternoon : a locket with diamonds and pearls, to have his hair in it. He dined here : as did my old Meriel. . . . I wrote to all my darling boys : even to my little fellows at Hagley.
—A bright, serene day of inward and outward sunshine. We are engaged, and my doubts and fears have been all absorbed in the wonderful happiness and peace. "Full measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, doth He give into my bosom." I have got my 1st present : he brought it me this afternoon : a locket with diamonds and pearls, to have his hair in it. He dined here : as did my old Meriel. . . . I wrote to all my darling boys : even to my little fellows at Hagley.
20Apr1864, Third Waiting Ends
LONDON, Wednesday, April 20th, 1864.
—Same glorious weather. I carry away with me from Windsor such a vision of stately, smiling towers basking in pure sunshine, and nature blossoming and budding all round. And there is just such a springtide beginning in my heart. The Queen went to Osborne abt 4: Ly. Caroline, Ly. Augusta and I, off duty, came to London. I dined with old Meriel, 0 so snugly ; and had the nicest of talks with her, and with Mrs. Talbot. Garibaldi dinner and party here. The Duke of Devonshire, Ly. Louisa, Lord Frederic, and Ld. Edward were here. Such a happy evening.
—Same glorious weather. I carry away with me from Windsor such a vision of stately, smiling towers basking in pure sunshine, and nature blossoming and budding all round. And there is just such a springtide beginning in my heart. The Queen went to Osborne abt 4: Ly. Caroline, Ly. Augusta and I, off duty, came to London. I dined with old Meriel, 0 so snugly ; and had the nicest of talks with her, and with Mrs. Talbot. Garibaldi dinner and party here. The Duke of Devonshire, Ly. Louisa, Lord Frederic, and Ld. Edward were here. Such a happy evening.
18Apr1864, Luxuries of Royal Travelling
WINDSOR, Monday, April 18th, 1864.
—Soon after 4, we went to London with the Princesses (Ly. Caroline, Ld. Caithness, and Mr. West also in attendance) to a Philharmonic concert at Hanover Square : music out of Shakespeare principally, and partly in honour of his tercentenary. It was very good and delightful ; and I confess I enjoyed considerably the luxuries of Royal travelling and Royal places at the concert.
—Soon after 4, we went to London with the Princesses (Ly. Caroline, Ld. Caithness, and Mr. West also in attendance) to a Philharmonic concert at Hanover Square : music out of Shakespeare principally, and partly in honour of his tercentenary. It was very good and delightful ; and I confess I enjoyed considerably the luxuries of Royal travelling and Royal places at the concert.
17Apr1864, Fears Melt Away
WINDSOR, 3rd Sunday in Easter, April 17th, 1864.
—To-day my doubts and fears (which have been many) began to melt away.
—To-day my doubts and fears (which have been many) began to melt away.
16Apr1864, My Brothers Visit Windsor
WINDSOR, Saturday, April 16th, 1864.
—My darling old boys came to tea in my room ; I having begged of Sir Thomas Biddulph unlimited eggs, etc., for them. Old Spencer was at S. George's. The little bit of home talk was very snug and refreshing, in spite of the serrement-de-coeur it gave me. I longed to tell them something of my wonderful secret ; but I could only hug them very much. I took them for a peep at the corridor ; they were in mortal dread of being caught by "Her Sacred Majesty" ; but no such thing happened.
—My darling old boys came to tea in my room ; I having begged of Sir Thomas Biddulph unlimited eggs, etc., for them. Old Spencer was at S. George's. The little bit of home talk was very snug and refreshing, in spite of the serrement-de-coeur it gave me. I longed to tell them something of my wonderful secret ; but I could only hug them very much. I took them for a peep at the corridor ; they were in mortal dread of being caught by "Her Sacred Majesty" ; but no such thing happened.
Friday, January 09, 2009
15Apr1864, I Am in a New Life
WINDSOR, Friday, April 15th, 1864.
—The quiet monotonous day, outwardly so like my 1st days of waiting, had this wonderful undertone running through it, and I am in a new life. If I could only feel more comprehensibly : see more clearly ! But I trust to God's Love for that. I wrote to my little Bob, and to Papa and Atie. P. Walked and drove with Miss Cathcart. Ly. Jocelyn is Ly.-in-Waiting. The Queen has got neuralgia in her face, and has accordingly put off the reception that was to have been to-morrow. The Duke and Duchess of Argyll came to dinner. At bedtime the dear kind little Duchess took me to her room, and kissed me, and said how good he was. 0 that I may deserve it all !
—The quiet monotonous day, outwardly so like my 1st days of waiting, had this wonderful undertone running through it, and I am in a new life. If I could only feel more comprehensibly : see more clearly ! But I trust to God's Love for that. I wrote to my little Bob, and to Papa and Atie. P. Walked and drove with Miss Cathcart. Ly. Jocelyn is Ly.-in-Waiting. The Queen has got neuralgia in her face, and has accordingly put off the reception that was to have been to-morrow. The Duke and Duchess of Argyll came to dinner. At bedtime the dear kind little Duchess took me to her room, and kissed me, and said how good he was. 0 that I may deserve it all !
14Apr1864, Foolish and Bewildered
WINDSOR, Thursday, April 14th, 1864.
—Ld. Frederic came to breakfast. After luncheon Ly. Louisa came to see me. I strive to lean entirely on the Loving Hand which has led me all my life long until now, and has ordered this for me. But I seem frightened, in spite of the strange happiness. God make it right for me ! God guide me in my decision ! I am so foolish and bewildered. It is a thought full of peace that I am surrounded with many prayers. I came here, where all feels dreamlike to me. Darling Meriel came to Carlton Terrace, saw Ly. Louisa, and took me to the station.
—Ld. Frederic came to breakfast. After luncheon Ly. Louisa came to see me. I strive to lean entirely on the Loving Hand which has led me all my life long until now, and has ordered this for me. But I seem frightened, in spite of the strange happiness. God make it right for me ! God guide me in my decision ! I am so foolish and bewildered. It is a thought full of peace that I am surrounded with many prayers. I came here, where all feels dreamlike to me. Darling Meriel came to Carlton Terrace, saw Ly. Louisa, and took me to the station.
13Apr1864, A Memorable Evening
Wednesday, April 13th, 1864.
—W.E.G.'s dined at Stafford House, to meet Garibaldi : We went there in the evening. And it was to be a never-to-be-forgotten evening to me.
—W.E.G.'s dined at Stafford House, to meet Garibaldi : We went there in the evening. And it was to be a never-to-be-forgotten evening to me.
12Apr1864, Luncheon with Garibaldi
LONDON, Tuesday, April 12th, 1864.
—I bkfasted in Geo. St., whence, to my delight, I was summoned by Atie. P., an invitation to a Chiswick luncheon given to Garibaldi having been sent to me. So I saw the great man close ; and was immensely struck by his simple dignity of manner during the trying process of being introduced to different people by the Dow. Dss. of Sutherland. One saw his mind was too great and humble for shyness. I had a very happy afternoon. Ld. Frederic (who was at Chiswick) came to high tea with us, and thence with us to the Adelphi, where "Leah" was acted.
—I bkfasted in Geo. St., whence, to my delight, I was summoned by Atie. P., an invitation to a Chiswick luncheon given to Garibaldi having been sent to me. So I saw the great man close ; and was immensely struck by his simple dignity of manner during the trying process of being introduced to different people by the Dow. Dss. of Sutherland. One saw his mind was too great and humble for shyness. I had a very happy afternoon. Ld. Frederic (who was at Chiswick) came to high tea with us, and thence with us to the Adelphi, where "Leah" was acted.
11Apr1864, Garibaldi Arrives
LONDON, Monday, April 11th, 1864.
—We spent a notable aftn in a window of the Privy Council Office ; Atie. P., Agnes, and I, with Ld. Frederic and Mr. Palgrave, waiting to see Garibaldi pass, on his way to Stafford House, which takes him in. We waited, and so did the great crowd that had assembled, till 6½, when at last, some time after a long procession of Working Men's Clubs and societies, with banners, had passed, the great man appeared in a carriage-and-six, wearing a blue-and-red cloak and wideawake. I suppose such a scene as has greeted him has never before been known, and never could be but in England. All the working people, of their own free will and enthusiasm, turned out in his honour ; nobody directed or controlled them (very few policemen), and to be sure it is grand to feel and see the perfect trust that may be placed in the mighty free action of Englishmen and their sympathy with what is high-minded and disinterested. They poured and flocked round the carriage, shaking hands, waving hats and handkerchiefs ; and he was accompanied all up the street by unbroken cheers. We were tolerably knocked up, even I ; yet I with Mary and Helen went after dinner to the Bishop of London's, to hear a woman read (not particularly well) passages (mostly beautiful) from Shakespeare, Tennyson, etc. The W.E.G.'s afterwds to Stafford House to meet Garibaldi ; poor Aggie to bed.
—We spent a notable aftn in a window of the Privy Council Office ; Atie. P., Agnes, and I, with Ld. Frederic and Mr. Palgrave, waiting to see Garibaldi pass, on his way to Stafford House, which takes him in. We waited, and so did the great crowd that had assembled, till 6½, when at last, some time after a long procession of Working Men's Clubs and societies, with banners, had passed, the great man appeared in a carriage-and-six, wearing a blue-and-red cloak and wideawake. I suppose such a scene as has greeted him has never before been known, and never could be but in England. All the working people, of their own free will and enthusiasm, turned out in his honour ; nobody directed or controlled them (very few policemen), and to be sure it is grand to feel and see the perfect trust that may be placed in the mighty free action of Englishmen and their sympathy with what is high-minded and disinterested. They poured and flocked round the carriage, shaking hands, waving hats and handkerchiefs ; and he was accompanied all up the street by unbroken cheers. We were tolerably knocked up, even I ; yet I with Mary and Helen went after dinner to the Bishop of London's, to hear a woman read (not particularly well) passages (mostly beautiful) from Shakespeare, Tennyson, etc. The W.E.G.'s afterwds to Stafford House to meet Garibaldi ; poor Aggie to bed.
09Apr1864, Viewing Herbert's Painting with Lord F.
LONDON, Saturday, April 9th, 1864.
—Atie. P. whisked off to the H. of Charity, then to be photographed ; and after luncheon, to which came Ld. Frederic and Ld. Richard Cavendish, and Uncle Henry, she went with Ld. F. and me to see a fine fresco of Moses showing the Tables of the Law, which Herbert is painting in one of the chambers of the Houses of Parliament. I conjecture humbly that its faults are, some monotony of expression and attitude, and something feeble in the drapery ; but the grouping and colouring are beautiful, I think ; also Moses' face, and the soft hot light and shade wonderful. I went to tea at the Stanleys of Alderley ; pleasant enough. Very pleasant party at Ld. Palmerston's.
—Atie. P. whisked off to the H. of Charity, then to be photographed ; and after luncheon, to which came Ld. Frederic and Ld. Richard Cavendish, and Uncle Henry, she went with Ld. F. and me to see a fine fresco of Moses showing the Tables of the Law, which Herbert is painting in one of the chambers of the Houses of Parliament. I conjecture humbly that its faults are, some monotony of expression and attitude, and something feeble in the drapery ; but the grouping and colouring are beautiful, I think ; also Moses' face, and the soft hot light and shade wonderful. I went to tea at the Stanleys of Alderley ; pleasant enough. Very pleasant party at Ld. Palmerston's.
08Apr1864, Garibaldi and Red Shirts
LONDON, Friday, April 8th, 1864.
—All the papers smile upon the Budget, even the Standard saying nothing more snubbing than that it was a réchauffé of one of Dizzy's 2 years back ! Uncle W., speaking of certain plays moving one to tears, said that there was something that made him feel ready to cry in his Budget ! viz. the description he gave of the gigantic power and prosperity of England. This I can well fancy. Drove with Agnes to call on wonderful old Miss Robertson, in her 89th year, able to walk briskly, and hear well, and bent upon coming the night Garibaldi dines here to squint at him from behind the door. For Garibaldi is in England, which fact makes everyone stand on their heads ; and I suppose all young ladies will shortly appear in red shirts, which, to my disgust, have come into fashion.
—All the papers smile upon the Budget, even the Standard saying nothing more snubbing than that it was a réchauffé of one of Dizzy's 2 years back ! Uncle W., speaking of certain plays moving one to tears, said that there was something that made him feel ready to cry in his Budget ! viz. the description he gave of the gigantic power and prosperity of England. This I can well fancy. Drove with Agnes to call on wonderful old Miss Robertson, in her 89th year, able to walk briskly, and hear well, and bent upon coming the night Garibaldi dines here to squint at him from behind the door. For Garibaldi is in England, which fact makes everyone stand on their heads ; and I suppose all young ladies will shortly appear in red shirts, which, to my disgust, have come into fashion.
07Apr1864, The Queen's Peculiar Desolation
LONDON, Thursday, April 7th, 1864.
—London feels oppressive and almost hot after Hagley : streets already a good deal blocked. The Saturday Review the other day had a disagreeable sort of threatening article about the Queen's maintaining her retirement ; and this (as is supposed) has led to her putting into the Times a statement of her determination to continue to delegate to others the matters of mere ceremonial, at the same time that she will never shrink from anything that may be beneficial to the people, of whose loyal affection she speaks warmly. She also says that the quantity of business that falls upon her in her loneliness and desolation has tried her health. Now all this should never have been allowed, as it is undignified for the Queen to defend herself in the Times against a wretched article in the Saturday Review ; but the expressions are most touching and pathetic, and I for one cd never bear to blame her. The country knows nothing of the Queen's peculiar desolation. It behoves us better to pray for her and to have pity, than to goad her, when she is devoting herself to duty and works of mercy, into Court gaieties. Aggie and I had the treat of going to hear the Budget, which took 3 hours, and was very interesting on the whole. A splendid surplus of 30,000, [FN: Sic ; but presumably a mistake for £3,000,000.] accordingly the income tax comes down from 7d. to 6d. and the sugar duties are greatly lowered.
—London feels oppressive and almost hot after Hagley : streets already a good deal blocked. The Saturday Review the other day had a disagreeable sort of threatening article about the Queen's maintaining her retirement ; and this (as is supposed) has led to her putting into the Times a statement of her determination to continue to delegate to others the matters of mere ceremonial, at the same time that she will never shrink from anything that may be beneficial to the people, of whose loyal affection she speaks warmly. She also says that the quantity of business that falls upon her in her loneliness and desolation has tried her health. Now all this should never have been allowed, as it is undignified for the Queen to defend herself in the Times against a wretched article in the Saturday Review ; but the expressions are most touching and pathetic, and I for one cd never bear to blame her. The country knows nothing of the Queen's peculiar desolation. It behoves us better to pray for her and to have pity, than to goad her, when she is devoting herself to duty and works of mercy, into Court gaieties. Aggie and I had the treat of going to hear the Budget, which took 3 hours, and was very interesting on the whole. A splendid surplus of 30,000, [FN: Sic ; but presumably a mistake for £3,000,000.] accordingly the income tax comes down from 7d. to 6d. and the sugar duties are greatly lowered.
06Apr1864, Dinner and a Party
LONDON, Wednesday, April 6th, 1864.
—Got here only just in time to scramble into a pink silk gown for a dinner and party. At dinner were Sir Robert and Ly. Emily Peel, Mr. [FN: Afterwards Lord Selborne and Lord Chancellor.] and Ly. Laura Palmer, Ld. Frederic Cavendish, Mr. Stansfield, Herbert the painter, Baron Rothschild.
—Got here only just in time to scramble into a pink silk gown for a dinner and party. At dinner were Sir Robert and Ly. Emily Peel, Mr. [FN: Afterwards Lord Selborne and Lord Chancellor.] and Ly. Laura Palmer, Ld. Frederic Cavendish, Mr. Stansfield, Herbert the painter, Baron Rothschild.
04Apr1864, Three Pummelled
HAGLEY, Monday, April 4th, 1864.
—Nevy and I had a splendid ride on to Kinver Edge and thence through Wolverley to Summerhill, where we called on Amelia Anson who looked very well. Claughtons out. A 3-barred fence obstructing the way on the top of the Edge, I put the hunter at it. He chose to take it standing, and alack ! off I rolled, dexterously falling pretty gently on my side on soft ground. Thus, mercifully, no harm resulted ; but I expect to feel well pummelled to-morrow. Perhaps, had I been 3 pummelled at the time I shd have stuck on ! but I won't stoop to that. We had grand gallops and only just got home in time for dinner.
—Nevy and I had a splendid ride on to Kinver Edge and thence through Wolverley to Summerhill, where we called on Amelia Anson who looked very well. Claughtons out. A 3-barred fence obstructing the way on the top of the Edge, I put the hunter at it. He chose to take it standing, and alack ! off I rolled, dexterously falling pretty gently on my side on soft ground. Thus, mercifully, no harm resulted ; but I expect to feel well pummelled to-morrow. Perhaps, had I been 3 pummelled at the time I shd have stuck on ! but I won't stoop to that. We had grand gallops and only just got home in time for dinner.
19Mar1864, Sibyl Grant's Wedding
LONDON, Saturday, March 19th, 1864.
—Sibyl Grant's wedding day : I was to have been bridesmaid, but feared I shd be late for the drawing-room. To the which I went, in a magnificent made out get-up of lilac train over white net, and in a Royal carriage. Made acquaintance with my colleague Miss Cathcart, a pretty, attractive person whom I think I shall get on with. The Princess looked very well, though thin : and the Prince immensely improved in looks and expression. Prss. Helena was there. I saw my 1st Court acquaintances, in the shape of Col. Liddell, Gen. Grey, and Ly. Ely. The latter not on duty as she had a daughter to present. Miss Cathcart and I being in waiting, failing 2 absent ones, stood on the steps of the Throne, just behind the fat backs of the Dss. of Cambridge and Prss. Mary ; and I was amused beyond measure at looking at the stream of old and young with their great variety of clumsy curtseys. At best, I came to the conclusion that people look rather like fools ; and at worst ! . . . Catherine Phillimore, whom her mother presented, looked better than any other young lady ; and went through the ordeal gracefully and with no apparent self-consciousness or affectation. The other people whom I knew were Ly. C. Lascelles and her daughter Beatrice, Ly. Meath, Mrs. Malcolm, Helen Baring, Ly. Clifden (looking ill and unhappy), Ly. Holmesdale, Mrs. Welby (late Victoria Wortley), Ly. A. Stanley, also a bride ; the Archbp. of Canterbury.
—Sibyl Grant's wedding day : I was to have been bridesmaid, but feared I shd be late for the drawing-room. To the which I went, in a magnificent made out get-up of lilac train over white net, and in a Royal carriage. Made acquaintance with my colleague Miss Cathcart, a pretty, attractive person whom I think I shall get on with. The Princess looked very well, though thin : and the Prince immensely improved in looks and expression. Prss. Helena was there. I saw my 1st Court acquaintances, in the shape of Col. Liddell, Gen. Grey, and Ly. Ely. The latter not on duty as she had a daughter to present. Miss Cathcart and I being in waiting, failing 2 absent ones, stood on the steps of the Throne, just behind the fat backs of the Dss. of Cambridge and Prss. Mary ; and I was amused beyond measure at looking at the stream of old and young with their great variety of clumsy curtseys. At best, I came to the conclusion that people look rather like fools ; and at worst ! . . . Catherine Phillimore, whom her mother presented, looked better than any other young lady ; and went through the ordeal gracefully and with no apparent self-consciousness or affectation. The other people whom I knew were Ly. C. Lascelles and her daughter Beatrice, Ly. Meath, Mrs. Malcolm, Helen Baring, Ly. Clifden (looking ill and unhappy), Ly. Holmesdale, Mrs. Welby (late Victoria Wortley), Ly. A. Stanley, also a bride ; the Archbp. of Canterbury.
18Mar1864, Mrs. Gladstone Very Busy
LONDON, Friday, March 18th, 1864.
—Found Atie. P. out, and heard that she is more overwhelmed with hard work than ever, as she attends certain meetings at London House where the Bp. assembles ladies to associate them in different acts of charity : an admirable thing, but Atie. P. has undertaken to visit a hospital in S. George's in the E., besides 3 other things. And how is she to do that, and all her own innumerable kind deeds, and her season and societyums, and be deep in politics, and be everything to Uncle W.—all at once ? She looks terribly fagged already. So does he, having been badgered in the House in re his excellent Government Annuities speech.
—Found Atie. P. out, and heard that she is more overwhelmed with hard work than ever, as she attends certain meetings at London House where the Bp. assembles ladies to associate them in different acts of charity : an admirable thing, but Atie. P. has undertaken to visit a hospital in S. George's in the E., besides 3 other things. And how is she to do that, and all her own innumerable kind deeds, and her season and societyums, and be deep in politics, and be everything to Uncle W.—all at once ? She looks terribly fagged already. So does he, having been badgered in the House in re his excellent Government Annuities speech.
17Mar1864, A Small Congregation
HAGLEY, Thursday, March 17th, 1864.
—Such a bright serene day, with warm sun and the early songs of birds all round one, that the E. wind could not make it disagreeable. I sat on the octagon bench after church, thoroughly enjoying the dawn of spring. Cong. 1.
—Such a bright serene day, with warm sun and the early songs of birds all round one, that the E. wind could not make it disagreeable. I sat on the octagon bench after church, thoroughly enjoying the dawn of spring. Cong. 1.
13Mar1864, Good Shooting
HAGLEY, March 14th, 1864.
—Did myself good by going out shooting with Charles, the dogs, and the little boys. But the result was small : 3 rabbits only falling victims, and those after I had set off churchwards.
—Did myself good by going out shooting with Charles, the dogs, and the little boys. But the result was small : 3 rabbits only falling victims, and those after I had set off churchwards.
12Mar1864, Promise of Spring
HAGLEY, Saturday, March 12th, 1864.
—Lovely sunny fresh day, full of the sweet promise of spring : a thing which has a power, unknown to summer, of "filling one's heart with joy and gladness."
—Lovely sunny fresh day, full of the sweet promise of spring : a thing which has a power, unknown to summer, of "filling one's heart with joy and gladness."
Thursday, January 08, 2009
09Mar1864, Jowett's Greek Professorship
HAGLEY, Wednesday, March 9th, 1864.
—Uncle Stephen went to Oxford yesterday, to vote in favour of Jowett's Greek Professorship having its salary raised, as has been done with all the others. His heresies not affecting his Greek teaching, this seems only fair ; but multitudes of furious clergy, frightened by the Privy Council judgment, posted up to oppose the measure, and it was negatived by a majority of 72 out of nearly 900. All Jowett's admirers, and all undecided and neutral men, will now think of him as a martyr. Of all pities, to pin such a grievance on him as this, when he confessedly throws his whole heart into his professorship and is now only paid £40. It does seem spiteful and blind. Surely truth can prevail against error though a heretic receives a sufficient salary for teaching Greek !
—Uncle Stephen went to Oxford yesterday, to vote in favour of Jowett's Greek Professorship having its salary raised, as has been done with all the others. His heresies not affecting his Greek teaching, this seems only fair ; but multitudes of furious clergy, frightened by the Privy Council judgment, posted up to oppose the measure, and it was negatived by a majority of 72 out of nearly 900. All Jowett's admirers, and all undecided and neutral men, will now think of him as a martyr. Of all pities, to pin such a grievance on him as this, when he confessedly throws his whole heart into his professorship and is now only paid £40. It does seem spiteful and blind. Surely truth can prevail against error though a heretic receives a sufficient salary for teaching Greek !
07Mar1864, Unutterable Things
HAGLEY, Monday, March 7th, 1864.
—Miss M. looks unutterable things, but says nothing.
—Miss M. looks unutterable things, but says nothing.
03Mar1864, A Relief
HAGLEY, Thursday, March 3rd, 1864.
—Miss M. got the letter, we presume ; but she gave no sign of surprise, indignation, or wounded feeling, and was particularly affable at luncheon. Such a relief !
—Miss M. got the letter, we presume ; but she gave no sign of surprise, indignation, or wounded feeling, and was particularly affable at luncheon. Such a relief !
02Mar1864, Miss Merlet is Dismissed
HAGLEY, Wednesday, March 2nd, 1864.
—Papa went to Worcester for 2 nights, which fact is the prelude to one of our many small but unpleasant catastrophes : his letter of dismissal to Miss Merlet whose "rapports" between us and the girls are very objectionable, and whose tone of mind and conversation is flippant and sarcastic.
—Papa went to Worcester for 2 nights, which fact is the prelude to one of our many small but unpleasant catastrophes : his letter of dismissal to Miss Merlet whose "rapports" between us and the girls are very objectionable, and whose tone of mind and conversation is flippant and sarcastic.
26Feb1864, Made Southerners of Us All
HAGLEY, Friday, February 26th, 1864.
—Went on trying to thaw. I did district. I received a most disquieting letter from Ly. Jocelyn, announcing the Queen's wish that I shd take the 1st half of an absent M. of H.'s waiting, begg. on Mar. 17, unless it is very inconvenient. I wrote word that it was very inconvenient, and await the result in a state of nervous tension. I shd be there for Holy Week and Easter Day ! Horrid thought ! A Southern American called Harrington gave a very interesting lecture on the secession and its causes, and made Southerners of us all. Though he has been a slaveholder himself, he wd not defend the institution of slavery, and said he believed the war wd do good in leading to gradual emancipation. In his state (S. Carolina) they don't allow husband and wife to be separated. He spoke with great bitterness of the Yankees.
—Went on trying to thaw. I did district. I received a most disquieting letter from Ly. Jocelyn, announcing the Queen's wish that I shd take the 1st half of an absent M. of H.'s waiting, begg. on Mar. 17, unless it is very inconvenient. I wrote word that it was very inconvenient, and await the result in a state of nervous tension. I shd be there for Holy Week and Easter Day ! Horrid thought ! A Southern American called Harrington gave a very interesting lecture on the secession and its causes, and made Southerners of us all. Though he has been a slaveholder himself, he wd not defend the institution of slavery, and said he believed the war wd do good in leading to gradual emancipation. In his state (S. Carolina) they don't allow husband and wife to be separated. He spoke with great bitterness of the Yankees.
25Feb1864, A Decision by the Privy Council
HAGLEY, Thursday, February 25th, 1864.
—There is violent excitement at the Privy Council having passed a judgment in favour of Wilson and Williams, 2 writers in the " Essays and Reviews," whom the Bp. of Salisbury and another indicted before it. Some think the decision of terrible consequence, and likely to compromise the Church, but Papa and others take the more reasonable line of viewing it as what it is—a mere legal acquittal of men whose opinions the Church has disavowed and protested against as strongly as she is capable of doing. And the Judgment carefully disclaims any intention of expressing approval of the horrid book. The "counts" were unwisely chosen, and not to be legally considered as proved against them.
—There is violent excitement at the Privy Council having passed a judgment in favour of Wilson and Williams, 2 writers in the " Essays and Reviews," whom the Bp. of Salisbury and another indicted before it. Some think the decision of terrible consequence, and likely to compromise the Church, but Papa and others take the more reasonable line of viewing it as what it is—a mere legal acquittal of men whose opinions the Church has disavowed and protested against as strongly as she is capable of doing. And the Judgment carefully disclaims any intention of expressing approval of the horrid book. The "counts" were unwisely chosen, and not to be legally considered as proved against them.
11Feb1864, Reading The Birthday
HAGLEY, Thursday, February 11th, 1864.
—I went with Lavinia to Stakenbridge, where we gave broth to the Wm. Smiths, pudding to Mrs. Billingham, and an egg to Betty Poole. I have been reading the chapter on Self-denial to the little boys (in "The Birthday"), and to-day there was a bit about not giving in charity of what costs us nothing. They soon understood what was meant, and thereupon we went in to luncheon. I put some broth into a can, and told Alfred I shd like him and Newmany to take it into the village. "0," says Alfred, "but I want to go and slide !" "Now then," said I ; no more ; to remind him of what we had been reading. "0, I forgot !" said the little fellow in a moment, getting quite red ; and he went as willingly as possible.
Finding, to my delight, that I have £70 at My Bankers', I spent most of the morning sending off cheques in different directions, to my infinite pride.
—I went with Lavinia to Stakenbridge, where we gave broth to the Wm. Smiths, pudding to Mrs. Billingham, and an egg to Betty Poole. I have been reading the chapter on Self-denial to the little boys (in "The Birthday"), and to-day there was a bit about not giving in charity of what costs us nothing. They soon understood what was meant, and thereupon we went in to luncheon. I put some broth into a can, and told Alfred I shd like him and Newmany to take it into the village. "0," says Alfred, "but I want to go and slide !" "Now then," said I ; no more ; to remind him of what we had been reading. "0, I forgot !" said the little fellow in a moment, getting quite red ; and he went as willingly as possible.
Finding, to my delight, that I have £70 at My Bankers', I spent most of the morning sending off cheques in different directions, to my infinite pride.
05Feb1864, Parliament Opens Without the Queen
HAGLEY, Friday, February 5th, 1864.
—Frost, and the 1st snow worth mentioning lay on the ground ; real enough to be galoshed against. Parliament opened yesterday : again by Royal Commission. One can't blame the Queen for shrinking from doing it this one year more : even with the Prince by her side, her nervousness used to be nearly overpowering ; and she must have broken the ice by going through some less trying State duty first. This year, too, of course the speech had to take a Danish line about the wretched duchies, whereas the Queen's private sympathies must be German. But alas ! there is an official announcement in to-day's Times that she still feels unequal to any State ceremonials, and the Prince and Princess of Wales are to hold levees and drawing-rooms. I fear there will be great grumbling and discontent at this ; and Oh the difficulty of the Prince of Wales' position !
—Frost, and the 1st snow worth mentioning lay on the ground ; real enough to be galoshed against. Parliament opened yesterday : again by Royal Commission. One can't blame the Queen for shrinking from doing it this one year more : even with the Prince by her side, her nervousness used to be nearly overpowering ; and she must have broken the ice by going through some less trying State duty first. This year, too, of course the speech had to take a Danish line about the wretched duchies, whereas the Queen's private sympathies must be German. But alas ! there is an official announcement in to-day's Times that she still feels unequal to any State ceremonials, and the Prince and Princess of Wales are to hold levees and drawing-rooms. I fear there will be great grumbling and discontent at this ; and Oh the difficulty of the Prince of Wales' position !
01Feb1864, Many Die in Chili
HAGLEY, Monday, February 1st, 1864.
—Made a tremendous scrimmage and rout among my clothes against the arrival of my new abigail ; a nice-looking, quiet-mannered body called Morgan, foreign only inasmuch as she is Welsh ; I have had enough of French (Ducelliez), Swiss (Henriette), and German (Gielen) experience ! The papers are full of the most horrible calamity ever heard of : the burning of 2,000 people, chiefly women and children, wedged together in a great church at Chili, where a great festivity was being held in honour of the "Immaculate Conception." The place was crammed with oil lamps and draperies and burnt so fiercely that all was over in a quarter of an hour. The two chief doors were blocked up with bodies, so wedged that hardly any could be dragged out by main force. Whole families have died together. The wretched priests secured the door of the sacristy for the saving of holy sofas, images, etc., and then escaped themselves.
—Made a tremendous scrimmage and rout among my clothes against the arrival of my new abigail ; a nice-looking, quiet-mannered body called Morgan, foreign only inasmuch as she is Welsh ; I have had enough of French (Ducelliez), Swiss (Henriette), and German (Gielen) experience ! The papers are full of the most horrible calamity ever heard of : the burning of 2,000 people, chiefly women and children, wedged together in a great church at Chili, where a great festivity was being held in honour of the "Immaculate Conception." The place was crammed with oil lamps and draperies and burnt so fiercely that all was over in a quarter of an hour. The two chief doors were blocked up with bodies, so wedged that hardly any could be dragged out by main force. Whole families have died together. The wretched priests secured the door of the sacristy for the saving of holy sofas, images, etc., and then escaped themselves.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
29Jan1864, Dinner at Ld. Russell's With Dickens
LONDON, Friday, January 29th, 1864.
—We dined at Ld. Russell's, which was very pleasant. There were there Dickens & Landseer ; neither very pleasant to look at, though one saw wit and genius in Dickens' odd eyes. Ld. Amberley took me in : seems clever and acute, but like so many men nowadays takes one's breath away by unchurchlike, not to say unbiblical, opinions, as for instance, that all mankind are born innocent and without the germs of sin ; and something very like "truth is what every man troweth."
—We dined at Ld. Russell's, which was very pleasant. There were there Dickens & Landseer ; neither very pleasant to look at, though one saw wit and genius in Dickens' odd eyes. Ld. Amberley took me in : seems clever and acute, but like so many men nowadays takes one's breath away by unchurchlike, not to say unbiblical, opinions, as for instance, that all mankind are born innocent and without the germs of sin ; and something very like "truth is what every man troweth."
25Jan1864, Stanley's Farewell Sermon
LONDON, Monday, January 25th, 1864.
— I read Stanley's farewell sermon at Oxford (Ch. Ch.). It grieved and shocked me, in spite of great eloquence, earnestness, and feeling ; for I cannot help seeing that the aims and the standard he puts forward are not distinctively Christian, but more like those of some refined philosophy ; and one asks oneself, where are the old paths ? the Bible rules, the humble obedience, above all, the following of the simple but Perfect Pattern ? These "dangerous days" are full of teaching that wanders from all these, and bewilders one with false liberality and confused belief. God keep us to the strait and narrow Way !
— I read Stanley's farewell sermon at Oxford (Ch. Ch.). It grieved and shocked me, in spite of great eloquence, earnestness, and feeling ; for I cannot help seeing that the aims and the standard he puts forward are not distinctively Christian, but more like those of some refined philosophy ; and one asks oneself, where are the old paths ? the Bible rules, the humble obedience, above all, the following of the simple but Perfect Pattern ? These "dangerous days" are full of teaching that wanders from all these, and bewilders one with false liberality and confused belief. God keep us to the strait and narrow Way !
20Jan1864, Dining With the Queen Again, So Sad
OSBORNE, Wednesday, January 20th, 1864.
—A 2nd time I have dined with the Queen ; this time I felt a good deal of trepidation, for in the 1st place I was the only one who received the order, and after waiting in vain for the Princesses as long as I dared, I had to march down all alone, when to my relief I found Ly. Biddulph sitting in the drawing-room. And she, Pr. Leiningen, and I got on cheerfully till the Queen appeared abt ¼ 9. She goes straight into the dining-room now without entering the dr. room. Well, in the next place, I had 2 speeches hanging over my head, one respecting a tinted photogr. of myself for the Queen : the other, to tell her I was going to-morrow. I sat opposite the Queen, and was much moved and taken out of by her expression of sadness. It was as if she had had to go thro' something which had stirred up the grief : her eyes reminded me of Mme. de Sévigné's description "des yeux qui ont pleures," and her whole look had a pathetic and patient sadness in it. And it touched one more from her affecting nothing. At first she was rather silent, but she spoke and smiled. And after a time she cheered up again ; but it has put before my very eyes something of the sorrow which hitherto I cd only picture to myself ; and this did go deep into my heart. She accepted the photograph and admired it. And then came her goodbye, and I felt I cd not help pressing her hand as I kissed it ; for what wouldn't I do for her?
—A 2nd time I have dined with the Queen ; this time I felt a good deal of trepidation, for in the 1st place I was the only one who received the order, and after waiting in vain for the Princesses as long as I dared, I had to march down all alone, when to my relief I found Ly. Biddulph sitting in the drawing-room. And she, Pr. Leiningen, and I got on cheerfully till the Queen appeared abt ¼ 9. She goes straight into the dining-room now without entering the dr. room. Well, in the next place, I had 2 speeches hanging over my head, one respecting a tinted photogr. of myself for the Queen : the other, to tell her I was going to-morrow. I sat opposite the Queen, and was much moved and taken out of by her expression of sadness. It was as if she had had to go thro' something which had stirred up the grief : her eyes reminded me of Mme. de Sévigné's description "des yeux qui ont pleures," and her whole look had a pathetic and patient sadness in it. And it touched one more from her affecting nothing. At first she was rather silent, but she spoke and smiled. And after a time she cheered up again ; but it has put before my very eyes something of the sorrow which hitherto I cd only picture to myself ; and this did go deep into my heart. She accepted the photograph and admired it. And then came her goodbye, and I felt I cd not help pressing her hand as I kissed it ; for what wouldn't I do for her?
17Jan1864, Dining With the Queen
OSBORNE, 2nd Sunday after Epiphany, January 17th, 1864.
—Poured all the morning. After many vacillations of the Royal will, the upshot was that the Household went to church on its own account, Ly. Ch. and I being diddled out of half the service by the Queen's keeping us to go with her for the latter half. And she did not go. Mr. Prothero preacht on death. In the aft., however, the Queen went, and thus I saw her to speak to for the 1st time. She took my hand and kissed me so kindly before getting into the carriage. A very good thanksgiving prayer was read for the Prss. of Wales and her baby. The Dean preacht, with a beautiful allusion to the little Prince's birth close to his grandfather's tomb. There came off my great event of dining with the Queen, which was very much more pleasure than terror to me. There was much more conversation than I expected ; the Queen talking and laughing cheerfully. She and the Dean spoke about sermons and Presbyterian preachers ; and the Dean made no bones of making occasional hits at the Scotch reverends, which the Queen took as a good joke. Then came a good deal about the poor of the great towns ; and how I should have liked to have brought the Mission Women on the tapis ! But brazen as I was, I hadn't quite that courage. The Queen spoke to me 2 or 3 times very kindly. We stood talking in the dining-room for a little while afterwards, then the Queen vanished, and we went to the ladies' room and joined the others.
—Poured all the morning. After many vacillations of the Royal will, the upshot was that the Household went to church on its own account, Ly. Ch. and I being diddled out of half the service by the Queen's keeping us to go with her for the latter half. And she did not go. Mr. Prothero preacht on death. In the aft., however, the Queen went, and thus I saw her to speak to for the 1st time. She took my hand and kissed me so kindly before getting into the carriage. A very good thanksgiving prayer was read for the Prss. of Wales and her baby. The Dean preacht, with a beautiful allusion to the little Prince's birth close to his grandfather's tomb. There came off my great event of dining with the Queen, which was very much more pleasure than terror to me. There was much more conversation than I expected ; the Queen talking and laughing cheerfully. She and the Dean spoke about sermons and Presbyterian preachers ; and the Dean made no bones of making occasional hits at the Scotch reverends, which the Queen took as a good joke. Then came a good deal about the poor of the great towns ; and how I should have liked to have brought the Mission Women on the tapis ! But brazen as I was, I hadn't quite that courage. The Queen spoke to me 2 or 3 times very kindly. We stood talking in the dining-room for a little while afterwards, then the Queen vanished, and we went to the ladies' room and joined the others.
16Jan1864, Parkhurst Women Convicts
OSBORNE, Saturday, January 16th, 1864.
—Cold wind, but fine. At Parkhurst, the poor women convicts found out it was the Queen and numbers fell on their knees begging for mercy and pardon, so as quite to upset those who heard them, and the Queen said she was sure, if one had managed to fall down at her feet, she must have forgiven her ! I rode with Prss. Louise, on Sampson. Prss. Hohenlohe is ill with a feverish cold. Whist in the evening, with Sir Th. Biddulph, Mr. Holtzmann, and Col. Ponsonby ; Dr. Jenner dined, and horrified me with his ugliness which is something suggestive to me of Voltaire.
—Cold wind, but fine. At Parkhurst, the poor women convicts found out it was the Queen and numbers fell on their knees begging for mercy and pardon, so as quite to upset those who heard them, and the Queen said she was sure, if one had managed to fall down at her feet, she must have forgiven her ! I rode with Prss. Louise, on Sampson. Prss. Hohenlohe is ill with a feverish cold. Whist in the evening, with Sir Th. Biddulph, Mr. Holtzmann, and Col. Ponsonby ; Dr. Jenner dined, and horrified me with his ugliness which is something suggestive to me of Voltaire.
14Jan1864, Die Or Go Out of Her Mind
Thursday, January 14th, 1864.
—Yesterday's weather aggravated. Poor Miss Bowater heard of her cousin's death, and went away in great trouble, thus interrupting the early growth between us of a very promising friendship : indeed I miss her much as the only companion among all these elderly people. I walked with Lady Churchill, who is a most winning and attractive person ; quite the most highbred-looking woman I ever saw, and with the kindest and most simple, unaffected manner : tall, dignified, and graceful, with a small noble head ; and her whole look reminding one of a gazelle. Saw Prss. Helena for a moment in Miss B.'s room : she received me very kindly ; interests one from her gentle, thoughtful expression, and lovely smile like the Queen's, on a face otherwise plain. Her manner is like one who has thought and done too much for her age, and been a comforter when others are only thinking of being merry-makers. Spent the aftn in my own room after the announcement of "No orders," till tea, after which kind, nice Countess Blucher took me to her room, where we had pleasant talk till 6¼. She spoke strongly of the improvement that strikes her in the Queen since her terrible loss : increased seriousness and patient earnestness in doing her duties, which are so heavy that the Queen has sometimes said they are too much for any woman ; and who can tell how terribly she must miss the Prince whose advice she used to ask in every detail, great and small ! Why won't people realize the burden and loneliness, and thank God for the strength He has given, instead of fretting at her not doing this and that ! Countess Blucher said that when Princess Hohenlohe heard of the Prince's death, the Countess found her walking up and down the room in real despair and saying, "One of two things must happen to my sister : I know her. She must either die of this, or go out of her mind." Isn't it a direct answer to prayer that instead of this the Queen is well, doing her duty, and resigned so entirely to God's Will that she said herself she wd not wish him back? The Household dinner consisted of the Dean and Mrs. Wellesley, Ly. Churchill, Col. Ponsonby, M. Holtzmann, and Mrs. Bruce ; and I was interested all thro' dinner talking of languages with M. Holtzmann ; and whist enlivened the evening.
—Yesterday's weather aggravated. Poor Miss Bowater heard of her cousin's death, and went away in great trouble, thus interrupting the early growth between us of a very promising friendship : indeed I miss her much as the only companion among all these elderly people. I walked with Lady Churchill, who is a most winning and attractive person ; quite the most highbred-looking woman I ever saw, and with the kindest and most simple, unaffected manner : tall, dignified, and graceful, with a small noble head ; and her whole look reminding one of a gazelle. Saw Prss. Helena for a moment in Miss B.'s room : she received me very kindly ; interests one from her gentle, thoughtful expression, and lovely smile like the Queen's, on a face otherwise plain. Her manner is like one who has thought and done too much for her age, and been a comforter when others are only thinking of being merry-makers. Spent the aftn in my own room after the announcement of "No orders," till tea, after which kind, nice Countess Blucher took me to her room, where we had pleasant talk till 6¼. She spoke strongly of the improvement that strikes her in the Queen since her terrible loss : increased seriousness and patient earnestness in doing her duties, which are so heavy that the Queen has sometimes said they are too much for any woman ; and who can tell how terribly she must miss the Prince whose advice she used to ask in every detail, great and small ! Why won't people realize the burden and loneliness, and thank God for the strength He has given, instead of fretting at her not doing this and that ! Countess Blucher said that when Princess Hohenlohe heard of the Prince's death, the Countess found her walking up and down the room in real despair and saying, "One of two things must happen to my sister : I know her. She must either die of this, or go out of her mind." Isn't it a direct answer to prayer that instead of this the Queen is well, doing her duty, and resigned so entirely to God's Will that she said herself she wd not wish him back? The Household dinner consisted of the Dean and Mrs. Wellesley, Ly. Churchill, Col. Ponsonby, M. Holtzmann, and Mrs. Bruce ; and I was interested all thro' dinner talking of languages with M. Holtzmann ; and whist enlivened the evening.
Saturday, January 03, 2009
13Jan1864, Queen Causes General Acceleration
OSBORNE, Wednesday, January 13th, 1864.
—A little before 5 the Queen returned from Windsor, and what Granny says Miss Skerritt used to call a "general acceleration" seemed to me at once to be observable. Bustling footsteps, doors opening and shutting, the Lady-in-Waiting taking audible possession of the room next mine, unknown men cropping up in the corridor, and all the blazing liveries bursting out. I saw Prss. Helena, but no one else. Household dinner, whereat were Ly. Churchill (the Lady-in-Waiting), Mrs. Bruce, the Biddulphs, M. Holtzmann, and those already in the house, except Countess Blucher. Conversation flowed about the Princess and baby. It is wrapped up in cotton-wool, but thrives and is perfectly formed ; wd have been a very big child if it had waited the proper time. When the Queen arrived there were 7 doctors in the house who had all appeared on the scene just in time to be too late, except Brown, who came in for it all. The name was discussed after dinner ; is to be Albert-Victor, I believe (Albert ought to be Godfather !). Both names much too foreign, as one can't but think, in spite of one's love and veneration for the Queen and Prince.
—A little before 5 the Queen returned from Windsor, and what Granny says Miss Skerritt used to call a "general acceleration" seemed to me at once to be observable. Bustling footsteps, doors opening and shutting, the Lady-in-Waiting taking audible possession of the room next mine, unknown men cropping up in the corridor, and all the blazing liveries bursting out. I saw Prss. Helena, but no one else. Household dinner, whereat were Ly. Churchill (the Lady-in-Waiting), Mrs. Bruce, the Biddulphs, M. Holtzmann, and those already in the house, except Countess Blucher. Conversation flowed about the Princess and baby. It is wrapped up in cotton-wool, but thrives and is perfectly formed ; wd have been a very big child if it had waited the proper time. When the Queen arrived there were 7 doctors in the house who had all appeared on the scene just in time to be too late, except Brown, who came in for it all. The name was discussed after dinner ; is to be Albert-Victor, I believe (Albert ought to be Godfather !). Both names much too foreign, as one can't but think, in spite of one's love and veneration for the Queen and Prince.
11Jan1864, Pitying the Royals
Monday, January 11th, 1864.
—Grey and mild. Miss Bowater and I rode very pleasantly with Prss. Louise, I on a nice little horse called Claudio. I was got up regardless of expense in a splendid new Wehnerhausen habit, with the horrid fashionable swallow-tail, and a chimney-pot ! which was so good as to fly off. Prss. Louise spoke of her father more than once, and mentioned one thing which touched one much. Speaking of the trees he had planted, he said once to the Queen : "I shall never see my trees grow up." "0, why not ?" said the Queen. "You wd only be 60 ; that isn't so very old." "No," he repeated, "I shall never see them grow up." And Ly. Caroline said that he always knew, if he had a fever, that he shd never recover from it. I walked in the grounds after luncheon with the Prss., which was a little dull, especially as a new boot pinched me ; and I cd not help pitying all these Royal people who are never allowed to go out of their own domain, Miss B. and I during the ride raving of country-house visiting. "I should like it !" said the Prss., half hesitatingly. "Ah, that is one thing we are deprived of." Goodness ! life must be rather monotonous. Excellent accts again : and the Princess of Wales delights in her baby. Poor tiny infant, how little it guesses of its great future, supposing it is to live !
—Grey and mild. Miss Bowater and I rode very pleasantly with Prss. Louise, I on a nice little horse called Claudio. I was got up regardless of expense in a splendid new Wehnerhausen habit, with the horrid fashionable swallow-tail, and a chimney-pot ! which was so good as to fly off. Prss. Louise spoke of her father more than once, and mentioned one thing which touched one much. Speaking of the trees he had planted, he said once to the Queen : "I shall never see my trees grow up." "0, why not ?" said the Queen. "You wd only be 60 ; that isn't so very old." "No," he repeated, "I shall never see them grow up." And Ly. Caroline said that he always knew, if he had a fever, that he shd never recover from it. I walked in the grounds after luncheon with the Prss., which was a little dull, especially as a new boot pinched me ; and I cd not help pitying all these Royal people who are never allowed to go out of their own domain, Miss B. and I during the ride raving of country-house visiting. "I should like it !" said the Prss., half hesitatingly. "Ah, that is one thing we are deprived of." Goodness ! life must be rather monotonous. Excellent accts again : and the Princess of Wales delights in her baby. Poor tiny infant, how little it guesses of its great future, supposing it is to live !
10Jan1864, Missed Second Service
OSBORNE, 1st Sunday after Epiphany, January 10th, 1864.
—A complete thaw, rather damp and chilly. To my satisfaction, we all attended the whole service at Whippingham (except Prss. Hohenlohe) in the morning. The church is fantastic and of no definable style, but rather attractive ; music bad. Mr. Prothero preached on the Magi. Nobody went to church again, so I missed the 2nd service for the 1st time since I recovered from the fever. Was glad I brought Arnold's sermons, and Archb. Leighton with me ; but 0 dear, it doesn't feel much like Sunday. Had tea with Prss. Louise and Pr. Leopold. Evening diversified with ivory letters, as at Windsor.
—A complete thaw, rather damp and chilly. To my satisfaction, we all attended the whole service at Whippingham (except Prss. Hohenlohe) in the morning. The church is fantastic and of no definable style, but rather attractive ; music bad. Mr. Prothero preached on the Magi. Nobody went to church again, so I missed the 2nd service for the 1st time since I recovered from the fever. Was glad I brought Arnold's sermons, and Archb. Leighton with me ; but 0 dear, it doesn't feel much like Sunday. Had tea with Prss. Louise and Pr. Leopold. Evening diversified with ivory letters, as at Windsor.
09Jan1864, Second Waiting Begins
OSBORNE, Saturday, January 9th, 1864.
—I left Hampton Court at 9½ and got to London early enough to have another 20 minutes of M., which rejoiced my heart. And at George St. I heard the wonderful news of the Princess of Wales's premature confinement at Frogmore of a "fine boy," [FN: Afterwards the Duke of Clarence. Died 1892.] yesterday evening at 9 ! A seven-months child ; but so was George III, who certainly throve nevertheless. Astonishing to think of the Prince of Wales with a baby. My journey was successful, the crossing entirely peaceful and unruffled, and a regal conveyance met me at Cowes. To my relief, I was shown straight up to a sunny little room, where I was discussing some chicken, and had just paused to count a quantity of money into which I had changed a cheque, when, to my horror, in walked Princess Louise, and it's a wonder I did not precipitate £37 at her feet. She has an exceedingly pretty manner, like all the others, compounded of dignity and kindliness. The Queen and Princess Helena went to Windsor early ; and this evening the Queen sent a telegraph saying all was well, but the poor wee Prince very small, and no wonder. There were at dinner Miss Bowater (I don't exactly know in what capacity, but she is an intimate friend of Prince Leopold—I was glad to see somebody under 40 !), Ly. Caroline, Countess Blucher, and Col. Ponsonby ; and we dined with Princess Louise and Prss. Hohenlohe. The dinner was certainly sepulchral, but the evening much helped by Prss. Louise showing Miss Bowater and me her photographs, and laughing and talking gaily. I was delighted to see photographs of Princess Royal's trio, of whom Pr. William seems like her brothers, Prss. Charlotte like her, and Pr. Albert something too ugly. There was a little playing.
—I left Hampton Court at 9½ and got to London early enough to have another 20 minutes of M., which rejoiced my heart. And at George St. I heard the wonderful news of the Princess of Wales's premature confinement at Frogmore of a "fine boy," [FN: Afterwards the Duke of Clarence. Died 1892.] yesterday evening at 9 ! A seven-months child ; but so was George III, who certainly throve nevertheless. Astonishing to think of the Prince of Wales with a baby. My journey was successful, the crossing entirely peaceful and unruffled, and a regal conveyance met me at Cowes. To my relief, I was shown straight up to a sunny little room, where I was discussing some chicken, and had just paused to count a quantity of money into which I had changed a cheque, when, to my horror, in walked Princess Louise, and it's a wonder I did not precipitate £37 at her feet. She has an exceedingly pretty manner, like all the others, compounded of dignity and kindliness. The Queen and Princess Helena went to Windsor early ; and this evening the Queen sent a telegraph saying all was well, but the poor wee Prince very small, and no wonder. There were at dinner Miss Bowater (I don't exactly know in what capacity, but she is an intimate friend of Prince Leopold—I was glad to see somebody under 40 !), Ly. Caroline, Countess Blucher, and Col. Ponsonby ; and we dined with Princess Louise and Prss. Hohenlohe. The dinner was certainly sepulchral, but the evening much helped by Prss. Louise showing Miss Bowater and me her photographs, and laughing and talking gaily. I was delighted to see photographs of Princess Royal's trio, of whom Pr. William seems like her brothers, Prss. Charlotte like her, and Pr. Albert something too ugly. There was a little playing.
08Jan1864, Shopping for the Second Waiting
HAMPTON COURT, Friday, January 8th, 1864.
—Frost felt less severe. 0 such a scramble of shopums as I have gone through ! That kindest of people, At. Yaddy, took me up to London this morning (darling Va with us), and under her auspices I have bought velvet and cloth cloaks, a hat, flowers, a bonnet, boots and shoes, gloves, collars and cuffs, a canezon, a sealskin muff, a linsey petticoat, a set of jet, a buckle, a set of studs, a fan, a new gown, etc., etc.
—Frost felt less severe. 0 such a scramble of shopums as I have gone through ! That kindest of people, At. Yaddy, took me up to London this morning (darling Va with us), and under her auspices I have bought velvet and cloth cloaks, a hat, flowers, a bonnet, boots and shoes, gloves, collars and cuffs, a canezon, a sealskin muff, a linsey petticoat, a set of jet, a buckle, a set of studs, a fan, a new gown, etc., etc.
07Jan1864, Meriel's Third Baby
HAMPTON COURT, Thursday, January 7th, 1864.
— A commission or two, and then came the comfort and delight of driving to dear George St., going up to the baby's room, and having my 1st sight of her, hearing my old darling's voice calling me and finding her on her sofa in her pretty room, all warm and snug in the firelight : a picture of peace and brightness ! And such a delightful 2 hours of talk as followed : all my excitement and perturbation are stroked down ; Osborne itself puts on a less awful face ; for old Meriel has a calm good judgment and serenity about her that infect me. The baby is a decidedly improved version of George [FN: Mr. Justice Talbot.] at the same age, the same fair skin, shapely little head, and besides tiny taper hands ; but she is a great deal larger and has a prettier mouth. Of all dear couples George and Mary are certainly the dearest. He greeted me with the most beaming smiles and hugged me in his soft arms, knowing me perfectly but not coming out with my name for some time. His talk is ridiculously fluent, as is proper indeed for the eldest of three !—himself not 3, however, till June. He is a regular Talbot, both in looks and ways. I asked him if Xmas was gone. " It's not gone, it's come." On my becoming a horse for him to ride, he immediately became a tiger to jump upon me. When he was consulted as to the baby's name he at once suggested Bison.
— A commission or two, and then came the comfort and delight of driving to dear George St., going up to the baby's room, and having my 1st sight of her, hearing my old darling's voice calling me and finding her on her sofa in her pretty room, all warm and snug in the firelight : a picture of peace and brightness ! And such a delightful 2 hours of talk as followed : all my excitement and perturbation are stroked down ; Osborne itself puts on a less awful face ; for old Meriel has a calm good judgment and serenity about her that infect me. The baby is a decidedly improved version of George [FN: Mr. Justice Talbot.] at the same age, the same fair skin, shapely little head, and besides tiny taper hands ; but she is a great deal larger and has a prettier mouth. Of all dear couples George and Mary are certainly the dearest. He greeted me with the most beaming smiles and hugged me in his soft arms, knowing me perfectly but not coming out with my name for some time. His talk is ridiculously fluent, as is proper indeed for the eldest of three !—himself not 3, however, till June. He is a regular Talbot, both in looks and ways. I asked him if Xmas was gone. " It's not gone, it's come." On my becoming a horse for him to ride, he immediately became a tiger to jump upon me. When he was consulted as to the baby's name he at once suggested Bison.
06Jan1864, Dreading a Second Waiting
HAGLEY, Wednesday, January 6th, 1864. Epiphany.
—This good-bye to home is most disquieting, and fills me with every sort of anxiety and bewilderment. I dread Osborne very much—indeed I am altogether awed in looking forward ; and the one thing only can make me quiet-minded — "So long Thy Hand hath blessed me, sure it still will lead me on."
—This good-bye to home is most disquieting, and fills me with every sort of anxiety and bewilderment. I dread Osborne very much—indeed I am altogether awed in looking forward ; and the one thing only can make me quiet-minded — "So long Thy Hand hath blessed me, sure it still will lead me on."
Friday, January 02, 2009
31Dec1863, Looking Forward with Awe
HAGLEY, Thursday, December 31st, 1863.
— . . . Last come my happy visits at Chatsworth and Hawarden. There is much in my heart to make me thoughtful, and to give me a sort of awe, in looking forward ; and if it were not for my trust—a faithful trust, though so weak and blind—in the Heavenly Guidance, I shd be full of restlessness and excitement. And as it is, I fear I shall be, sooner or later. But the Love of God has shone round us all for many years, through the shadows, and all the bright sunshine : to Him I would leave all the coming time, "casting all care upon Him, for He careth for us."
— . . . Last come my happy visits at Chatsworth and Hawarden. There is much in my heart to make me thoughtful, and to give me a sort of awe, in looking forward ; and if it were not for my trust—a faithful trust, though so weak and blind—in the Heavenly Guidance, I shd be full of restlessness and excitement. And as it is, I fear I shall be, sooner or later. But the Love of God has shone round us all for many years, through the shadows, and all the bright sunshine : to Him I would leave all the coming time, "casting all care upon Him, for He careth for us."
26Dec1863, Hallelujah Chorus
HAGLEY, Saturday, December 26th, 1863. St. Stephen's Day.
—I had a famous ride to Kinver Edge with Spencer and Arthur. I rode the Maid, and jumped clean over a gap, successfully. Cong. 3. The girls, Albert, Nevy, and Spencer and I had the treat of going to Birmingham to hear the "Messiah," which was performed admirably, the solo singers being Sims Reeves, Winn, Mme Rudersdorf, and Julia Elton. It was the 1st time the girls had heard an oratorio, and great was their enjoyment. I do believe one's joy in listening to the Hallelujah Chorus brings one nearer to Heaven than any other joy which is not directly religious.
—I had a famous ride to Kinver Edge with Spencer and Arthur. I rode the Maid, and jumped clean over a gap, successfully. Cong. 3. The girls, Albert, Nevy, and Spencer and I had the treat of going to Birmingham to hear the "Messiah," which was performed admirably, the solo singers being Sims Reeves, Winn, Mme Rudersdorf, and Julia Elton. It was the 1st time the girls had heard an oratorio, and great was their enjoyment. I do believe one's joy in listening to the Hallelujah Chorus brings one nearer to Heaven than any other joy which is not directly religious.
23Dec1863, Swallows Seen
HAGLEY, Wednesday, December 23rd, 1863.
—Lovely and soft. A man writes word to the Times that he has seen swallows.
—Lovely and soft. A man writes word to the Times that he has seen swallows.
16Dec1863, Spade Makers Strike
HAGLEY, Wednesday, December 16th, 1863.
—They say it lightened early this morning. I wrote a long letter to M. Did district, where I found distress, owing to a strike among the spade makers. Sum-total I have collected there in the yr, mostly monthly pennies, 18s. 11½d.
—They say it lightened early this morning. I wrote a long letter to M. Did district, where I found distress, owing to a strike among the spade makers. Sum-total I have collected there in the yr, mostly monthly pennies, 18s. 11½d.
14Dec1863, Something of a Dream
HAGLEY, Monday, December 14th, 1863.
—Lovely and very mild. This day 2 years ago the Prince Consort died. A Times leading article takes the opportunity to give the poor Queen another of its numerous lectures about coming out again, as if two years of the most piteous and terrible of all widowhoods was too much to allow for mourning ! At the same time it is only fair to say that the tone was loyal and loving, and full of respect for the Prince's memory.
I feel in something of a dream.
—Lovely and very mild. This day 2 years ago the Prince Consort died. A Times leading article takes the opportunity to give the poor Queen another of its numerous lectures about coming out again, as if two years of the most piteous and terrible of all widowhoods was too much to allow for mourning ! At the same time it is only fair to say that the tone was loyal and loving, and full of respect for the Prince's memory.
I feel in something of a dream.
10Dec1863, A Most Delightful Ball
HAWARDEN, Thursday, December 10th, 1863.
—The most delightful ball I have ever had, beginning before 10, and ending after three. Asked to dance by Lds. Brabazon and F. Cavendish, Messrs. Tollemache, L'Estrange, Finch, Tracy, Ross, Stopford, Charles Robarts, Hugh Gladstone : and Aggie and I did Sir Roger.
—The most delightful ball I have ever had, beginning before 10, and ending after three. Asked to dance by Lds. Brabazon and F. Cavendish, Messrs. Tollemache, L'Estrange, Finch, Tracy, Ross, Stopford, Charles Robarts, Hugh Gladstone : and Aggie and I did Sir Roger.
09Dec1863, A Capital Little Dance
HAWARDEN, Wednesday, December 9th, 1863.
—A slight touch of frost. Arrived Ly. De Tabley and her 2 daughters, Ly. Louisa and the Miss Pennants, Ly. and Miss Seymour, Ld. Brabazon, Messrs. Tracy, L'Estrange, Stopford, Ross, Finch (the last 3 caught at Hagley by Atie. Pussy !), and then 2 Robertson Gladstone eldest sons. We had a capital little dance : I was asked by Messrs. Tollemache, L'Estrange, Hugh Gladstone, Ross, Stopford, Lds. F. Cavendish and Brabazon. Such was the number to-night that I went to evening church instead of to dinner ! to save space.
Odd subjects sometimes come uppermost when hardly to be expected : I have been discussing Church questions with Ld. F., and the end not justifying the means with Mr. Tollemache, in re charity balls and bazaars.
—A slight touch of frost. Arrived Ly. De Tabley and her 2 daughters, Ly. Louisa and the Miss Pennants, Ly. and Miss Seymour, Ld. Brabazon, Messrs. Tracy, L'Estrange, Stopford, Ross, Finch (the last 3 caught at Hagley by Atie. Pussy !), and then 2 Robertson Gladstone eldest sons. We had a capital little dance : I was asked by Messrs. Tollemache, L'Estrange, Hugh Gladstone, Ross, Stopford, Lds. F. Cavendish and Brabazon. Such was the number to-night that I went to evening church instead of to dinner ! to save space.
Odd subjects sometimes come uppermost when hardly to be expected : I have been discussing Church questions with Ld. F., and the end not justifying the means with Mr. Tollemache, in re charity balls and bazaars.
08Dec1863, A Visit from Ld. Frederic
HAWARDEN, Tuesday, December 8th, 1863.
—Same soft weather, turning to rain after luncheon. It was delicious walking to early church in the spring-like mildness. Breakfasted at the Rectory. Drove in the rain for an hour with Mrs. and Emily Mildmay and Agnes. Ld. Frederic came. Pleasant evening of whist. Mr. Tollemache,[FN: This, I think, must be Mr. Lionel Tollemache, author of "Talks with Mr. Gladstone," and other works.] though nearly blind and with a terrific stutter, is clever and can be agreeable.
—Same soft weather, turning to rain after luncheon. It was delicious walking to early church in the spring-like mildness. Breakfasted at the Rectory. Drove in the rain for an hour with Mrs. and Emily Mildmay and Agnes. Ld. Frederic came. Pleasant evening of whist. Mr. Tollemache,[FN: This, I think, must be Mr. Lionel Tollemache, author of "Talks with Mr. Gladstone," and other works.] though nearly blind and with a terrific stutter, is clever and can be agreeable.
07Dec1863, Leaving Chatsworth
HAWARDEN, December 7th, 1863.
—I left beautiful Chatsworth and all its nice kind people, at 9½.
—I left beautiful Chatsworth and all its nice kind people, at 9½.
05Dec1863, Viewing Hardwicke
CHATSWORTH, Saturday, December 5th, 1863.
—Stormy soft wind, with a good deal of small rain, and a beautiful sunset. Such a pleasant day ; Papa and I drove with the Duke and Ly. Louisa to Hardwicke where we spent 2 hours going over the wonderful old house : I wished for Tallee with her antiquarian tastes, and I do wish indeed for a head that would remember all the curious things. The drive there and back very enjoyable, in spite of boisterous wind and wet : Ly. L. and I capped verses coming home. Dinner pleasant, my neighbours being Lord Frederic and Mr. Ashby who are both nice.
—Stormy soft wind, with a good deal of small rain, and a beautiful sunset. Such a pleasant day ; Papa and I drove with the Duke and Ly. Louisa to Hardwicke where we spent 2 hours going over the wonderful old house : I wished for Tallee with her antiquarian tastes, and I do wish indeed for a head that would remember all the curious things. The drive there and back very enjoyable, in spite of boisterous wind and wet : Ly. L. and I capped verses coming home. Dinner pleasant, my neighbours being Lord Frederic and Mr. Ashby who are both nice.
04Dec1863, An Argument with Ld. Frederic
CHATSWORTH, Friday, December 4th, 1863.
—Fine, though grey. We came here, arriving about 12½. Saw nobody till luncheon time. Walked after luncheon very pleasantly to the rabbit-warren, whence the view was lovely, lit up with a sort of sunless brightness. Found a number of gentlemen shooting there. At dinner I got into an argument with Ld. Frederic Cavendish on the Church, which excited and interested me. I don't think I was wrong, as I did not introduce the topic on purpose ; but I wish I had been somebody who cd have convinced him !
Round game. There are here the Duke and Ly. Louisa, Ld. F. and Ld. Edward, Mr. and Ly. Fanny Howard and their 2 daughters, Ld. and Ly. George Cavendish, and their daughter, lately married to Mr. A. Egerton, Ly. Caroline Lascelles and her 3 daughters, of whom Emma [FN: Afterwards Lady Edward Cavendish ; mother of the present Duke of Devonshire.] is a new Maid-of-Honour like me, with her 1st waiting, however, still to come.
—Fine, though grey. We came here, arriving about 12½. Saw nobody till luncheon time. Walked after luncheon very pleasantly to the rabbit-warren, whence the view was lovely, lit up with a sort of sunless brightness. Found a number of gentlemen shooting there. At dinner I got into an argument with Ld. Frederic Cavendish on the Church, which excited and interested me. I don't think I was wrong, as I did not introduce the topic on purpose ; but I wish I had been somebody who cd have convinced him !
Round game. There are here the Duke and Ly. Louisa, Ld. F. and Ld. Edward, Mr. and Ly. Fanny Howard and their 2 daughters, Ld. and Ly. George Cavendish, and their daughter, lately married to Mr. A. Egerton, Ly. Caroline Lascelles and her 3 daughters, of whom Emma [FN: Afterwards Lady Edward Cavendish ; mother of the present Duke of Devonshire.] is a new Maid-of-Honour like me, with her 1st waiting, however, still to come.
03Dec1863, Stranded in Derby
RAILWAY HOTEL, DERBY, Thursday, December 3rd, 1863.
—A day of adventures. First, such a hurricane of wind in the night as I have never heard, which only subsided a little in the day to rise again in the evening. Results in the park were two trees on Prince's Hill, one huge bough near the church and another in the avenue, and a fine chestnut in the shrubbery blown down. The morning I spent peacefully enough, entering the names in the club book for next year ; church, letters, etc. At 2½ set off with Gielen and Rowe, bound for Derby where Papa was to meet us at 6.20 and go on with us to Chatsworth. We got to Dudley with nothing more exciting to remark than the unfortunate station shed at Brettel Lane blown down upon its back. But on leaving Dudley my griefs began. First, Gielen bothered me with a disagreeable bit of abigailums [FN: Talk about servants' affairs.] ; squabbles between her and Ellen, which led, by the bye, to the latter giving me warning immediately after Prayers this morning. After Gielen had said her unpleasant say, I begged her to hold her tongue (not in those words), and morne silence prevailed for some time. Darkness fell, and we stopped dead for more than an hour at some horrible junction on the Dudley side of Burton, while the wind took the opportunity of howling wildly, accompanied by hail which encrusted the windows. The upshot was that we got to Derby at 7.40 instead of 6.20. No Papa ! And there we sat till past 10, waiting for the last London train—which never came in. At that hour into the waiting-room marched a maukin, with a telegram directing me to go to Chesterfield by the 8.15 train ! This delay was caused by the blowing down of the telegraph wires. Nothing now remained to me but to come here, and order dinner and beds. And I was comfortably writing this account of the day's proceedings, when Papa himself turned up, furious with the telegraph ; mutual explanations took place, and now bed, 0 bed !
—A day of adventures. First, such a hurricane of wind in the night as I have never heard, which only subsided a little in the day to rise again in the evening. Results in the park were two trees on Prince's Hill, one huge bough near the church and another in the avenue, and a fine chestnut in the shrubbery blown down. The morning I spent peacefully enough, entering the names in the club book for next year ; church, letters, etc. At 2½ set off with Gielen and Rowe, bound for Derby where Papa was to meet us at 6.20 and go on with us to Chatsworth. We got to Dudley with nothing more exciting to remark than the unfortunate station shed at Brettel Lane blown down upon its back. But on leaving Dudley my griefs began. First, Gielen bothered me with a disagreeable bit of abigailums [FN: Talk about servants' affairs.] ; squabbles between her and Ellen, which led, by the bye, to the latter giving me warning immediately after Prayers this morning. After Gielen had said her unpleasant say, I begged her to hold her tongue (not in those words), and morne silence prevailed for some time. Darkness fell, and we stopped dead for more than an hour at some horrible junction on the Dudley side of Burton, while the wind took the opportunity of howling wildly, accompanied by hail which encrusted the windows. The upshot was that we got to Derby at 7.40 instead of 6.20. No Papa ! And there we sat till past 10, waiting for the last London train—which never came in. At that hour into the waiting-room marched a maukin, with a telegram directing me to go to Chesterfield by the 8.15 train ! This delay was caused by the blowing down of the telegraph wires. Nothing now remained to me but to come here, and order dinner and beds. And I was comfortably writing this account of the day's proceedings, when Papa himself turned up, furious with the telegraph ; mutual explanations took place, and now bed, 0 bed !
30Nov1863, A Weary Evening
WITLEY, Monday, November 30th, 1863.
—I joined Papa at the station at 4 and came here with him. Find here Ld. Dudley, Mrs. Ward, her two very pretty daughters, Major Anson, and other gentlemen. A weary evening consisting of an hr and ¼'s waiting, then a long-drawn-out silent dinner, then sitting up till nearly 12½ , playing at a feeble sort of bowls! Our long drive from Kidderm St. was the pleasantest part, Papa and I having much to talk about.
—I joined Papa at the station at 4 and came here with him. Find here Ld. Dudley, Mrs. Ward, her two very pretty daughters, Major Anson, and other gentlemen. A weary evening consisting of an hr and ¼'s waiting, then a long-drawn-out silent dinner, then sitting up till nearly 12½ , playing at a feeble sort of bowls! Our long drive from Kidderm St. was the pleasantest part, Papa and I having much to talk about.
28Nov1863, Spring
Saturday, November 28th, 1863.
—Lovely. Newmany has brought me a bunch of big fragrant violets ; the pear blossoms (misguided creatures) are coming out ; and the other day we shot wild geranium and a harebell in the hedge, not to speak of light green fern. The very words breathe of spring.
—Lovely. Newmany has brought me a bunch of big fragrant violets ; the pear blossoms (misguided creatures) are coming out ; and the other day we shot wild geranium and a harebell in the hedge, not to speak of light green fern. The very words breathe of spring.
25Nov1863, The Homeless Poor
Wednesday, November 25th, 1863.
—Papers talk about the homeless poor, but nothing effectual is ever done : a poor man died of sheer starvation the other day.
—Papers talk about the homeless poor, but nothing effectual is ever done : a poor man died of sheer starvation the other day.
21Nov1863, Billiards
HAGLEY, Saturday, November 21st, 1863.
—Rained with few intervals all day : about 3.20 there was a hurricane of hail. At. E. turned up at 1 for an inauguration game of billiards on the newly cloth'd table in the hall, in which I made the 1st stroke, while she won the game. Billiards, Quartets, "Romeo and Juliet" with the girls.
—Rained with few intervals all day : about 3.20 there was a hurricane of hail. At. E. turned up at 1 for an inauguration game of billiards on the newly cloth'd table in the hall, in which I made the 1st stroke, while she won the game. Billiards, Quartets, "Romeo and Juliet" with the girls.
16Nov1863, Godley's Letters From America
HAGLEY, Monday, November 16th, 1863.
—I am reading Mr. Godley's letters to Mr. Adderley with gt interest : there is one in '43, treating of the terrible state of things then—misery of the working classes, and luxury of the upper—which anticipates, as if no one cd be surprised at such a result, an outbreak like the Fr. revolution : and which finds comfort in the Church movement then beginning to make way, as a counteracting and energetic principle opposed to the evils of the time. And to think that we have weathered the storm ! It gives one courage to face all the new and different dangers which are now around us. "Though I am sometime afraid, yet put I my trust in Thee," are words which true Religion and Loyalty might—and do, I think—take for their motto. There must be mighty prayers shielding our country, and much faith and love leavening it, or there could not be in it such life and earnestness working among all its terrible sin and darkness.
—I am reading Mr. Godley's letters to Mr. Adderley with gt interest : there is one in '43, treating of the terrible state of things then—misery of the working classes, and luxury of the upper—which anticipates, as if no one cd be surprised at such a result, an outbreak like the Fr. revolution : and which finds comfort in the Church movement then beginning to make way, as a counteracting and energetic principle opposed to the evils of the time. And to think that we have weathered the storm ! It gives one courage to face all the new and different dangers which are now around us. "Though I am sometime afraid, yet put I my trust in Thee," are words which true Religion and Loyalty might—and do, I think—take for their motto. There must be mighty prayers shielding our country, and much faith and love leavening it, or there could not be in it such life and earnestness working among all its terrible sin and darkness.
07Nov1863, Sounds Distsurb Unprotected Females
HAGLEY, Saturday, November 7th, 1863.
—A great deal of drizzle, but rather a pleasant mild afternoon. Abberley the deepest purple. We had a little fright last night to break into the monotony of life. Hearing mysterious sounds, as of knocking at a shutter, and steps on the gravel under my window at 11½ , I called up Newmany, and she called up Shirtliffe, and both called up Jane Brown, who was attired in the most astonishing huge frilled mob-cap. A footman upstairs was sought for in vain, so the 1st-mentioned trio of witches prowled down the wooden stairs, and by dint of 5 or 6 peals at the drawing-room bell, we elicited a response from William, who appeared dimly in the distance on Elly's stairs, and protests he had heard nothing, knew of nothing, and nothing was to be found. So we all went back to bed again, rather flat and very cold. This morning I solemnly summoned William, and soon the cat came out of the bag. "To tell the truth, Ma'am, I had been out smoking a pipe of tobacco !" and he was the tapper at the pantry window, at 11 he says ; but I maintain at 11½ , the doors being then all locked. I next had a pompous interview with Herbert and begged him to let a man sleep upstairs, while we are a set of unprotected females ; and he will restrict William and his pipe to more respectable hours. Peace then resumed her sway.
—A great deal of drizzle, but rather a pleasant mild afternoon. Abberley the deepest purple. We had a little fright last night to break into the monotony of life. Hearing mysterious sounds, as of knocking at a shutter, and steps on the gravel under my window at 11½ , I called up Newmany, and she called up Shirtliffe, and both called up Jane Brown, who was attired in the most astonishing huge frilled mob-cap. A footman upstairs was sought for in vain, so the 1st-mentioned trio of witches prowled down the wooden stairs, and by dint of 5 or 6 peals at the drawing-room bell, we elicited a response from William, who appeared dimly in the distance on Elly's stairs, and protests he had heard nothing, knew of nothing, and nothing was to be found. So we all went back to bed again, rather flat and very cold. This morning I solemnly summoned William, and soon the cat came out of the bag. "To tell the truth, Ma'am, I had been out smoking a pipe of tobacco !" and he was the tapper at the pantry window, at 11 he says ; but I maintain at 11½ , the doors being then all locked. I next had a pompous interview with Herbert and begged him to let a man sleep upstairs, while we are a set of unprotected females ; and he will restrict William and his pipe to more respectable hours. Peace then resumed her sway.
03Nov1863, The Servants' Ball
HAGLEY, Tuesday, November 3rd, 1863.
— Grim weather. A splendid servants' ball, to which came Stourbridge tradespeople and Hagley farmers, ended our week's doings ; and perhaps was the merriest and most spirited thing of all. The only drawback, but 0 dear, it was a great one, was dear old Elly knocking up this very day, and having to go to bed ; so that she missed the servants' ball for the 1st time. Charles had to go down the middle with Gielen, which was very flat. But great was the fun. I had Herbert ; Lavinia, Rowe ; May, Robson ; Edward, Shirtliffe ; Alfred, Jane Brown ; Johnny Mooreman ; Miss Merlet, Stephens ! In Sir Roger it was pretty to see Charles lift up Alfred that the couples might duck under his little arm. Before supper, Papa made them all a little speech, thanking them warmly for all their good feeling and heartiness. This seems to have delighted them all extremely : 3 cheers followed and another ("and a good one too") for Charles, and then the "Fine Old English Gentleman," Stephens solo, everybody chorus, and fiddle obbligato. Papa having incautiously said he hoped they wd stay as long as it suited them, we heard they kept it up till 6½ ! and many of our servants didn't go to bed at all. Great was the enthusiasm for Papa and Charles, as Newmany told us afterwards, and altogether it puts another warm bit of gratification into one's heart.
— Grim weather. A splendid servants' ball, to which came Stourbridge tradespeople and Hagley farmers, ended our week's doings ; and perhaps was the merriest and most spirited thing of all. The only drawback, but 0 dear, it was a great one, was dear old Elly knocking up this very day, and having to go to bed ; so that she missed the servants' ball for the 1st time. Charles had to go down the middle with Gielen, which was very flat. But great was the fun. I had Herbert ; Lavinia, Rowe ; May, Robson ; Edward, Shirtliffe ; Alfred, Jane Brown ; Johnny Mooreman ; Miss Merlet, Stephens ! In Sir Roger it was pretty to see Charles lift up Alfred that the couples might duck under his little arm. Before supper, Papa made them all a little speech, thanking them warmly for all their good feeling and heartiness. This seems to have delighted them all extremely : 3 cheers followed and another ("and a good one too") for Charles, and then the "Fine Old English Gentleman," Stephens solo, everybody chorus, and fiddle obbligato. Papa having incautiously said he hoped they wd stay as long as it suited them, we heard they kept it up till 6½ ! and many of our servants didn't go to bed at all. Great was the enthusiasm for Papa and Charles, as Newmany told us afterwards, and altogether it puts another warm bit of gratification into one's heart.
02Nov1863, A Dinnery Given by the Gentry
HAGLEY, Monday, November 2nd, 1863.
—Alas, alas, exeunt Granny, At. Coque, and Ly. Estcourt. Granny has been here 4 months, with a short interval. A dinner was given to Papa and Ch. by the gentry, which was as successful as everything else, only poor old Charles at last made one recollect that it was his 7th speech on the subject, and hesitated a little ; but ended well with some pretty words about his love for the place and neighbourhood. "The retired medical man," who has been all along beside himself with enthusiasm, was there, clapping fervently. On its being suggested that "the ladies" ought to have some wine, he flew up to me with a glass of claret, and such were his feelings that he could utter nothing but "I hope . . ." Mike Grazebrook was in the chair, and spoke at some length quite remarkably well and strikingly. Old John, at a moment's warning, had to propose the Army, Navy, Yeomanry, and Volunteers, and did it capitally. As we came home, we found, to our grief, that one of the fine old avenue elms had been blown down right across the road, and indeed the wind has been tremendous. Granny's health was drunk, Papa returning thanks beautifully.
—Alas, alas, exeunt Granny, At. Coque, and Ly. Estcourt. Granny has been here 4 months, with a short interval. A dinner was given to Papa and Ch. by the gentry, which was as successful as everything else, only poor old Charles at last made one recollect that it was his 7th speech on the subject, and hesitated a little ; but ended well with some pretty words about his love for the place and neighbourhood. "The retired medical man," who has been all along beside himself with enthusiasm, was there, clapping fervently. On its being suggested that "the ladies" ought to have some wine, he flew up to me with a glass of claret, and such were his feelings that he could utter nothing but "I hope . . ." Mike Grazebrook was in the chair, and spoke at some length quite remarkably well and strikingly. Old John, at a moment's warning, had to propose the Army, Navy, Yeomanry, and Volunteers, and did it capitally. As we came home, we found, to our grief, that one of the fine old avenue elms had been blown down right across the road, and indeed the wind has been tremendous. Granny's health was drunk, Papa returning thanks beautifully.
01Nov1863, Mad Hypotheses
HAGLEY, November 1st, 1863. All Saints' Day, 22nd Sunday after Trinity.
—This was a day of real peace after all our happy but exciting and overpowering week. Dear Sunday comes like a chime of bells over all the bustle of life, with its "sweet thoughts of peace." Uncle B. preached on All Saints, Mr. Stayner on being good. Having a remarkable croak in my voice which reached its climax a day or two back, I had no class, and much enjoyed the leisure. At dinner Ly. Estcourt gave vent to the following singular remark : "If my mother had been a boy, and if I had been a boy, I shd have been Lord Lyttelton !" Which led to a great many mad hypotheses of the same nature.
—This was a day of real peace after all our happy but exciting and overpowering week. Dear Sunday comes like a chime of bells over all the bustle of life, with its "sweet thoughts of peace." Uncle B. preached on All Saints, Mr. Stayner on being good. Having a remarkable croak in my voice which reached its climax a day or two back, I had no class, and much enjoyed the leisure. At dinner Ly. Estcourt gave vent to the following singular remark : "If my mother had been a boy, and if I had been a boy, I shd have been Lord Lyttelton !" Which led to a great many mad hypotheses of the same nature.
30Oct1863, The Tenants' Dinner
HAGLEY, Friday, October 30th, 1863.
— Weather howled again all night and nearly all day. Addresses have poured in-50 tenants dined at the Arms, Papa and Charles Mathews, etc., spoke : M., girls, J., and I came in for a little while to hear them. Charles wisely took the facetious line, as it was plain enough the stolid party wd have been entirely unmoved by any expressions of feeling. As it was, some of them laughed till they were purple, when he said his knowledge of farming consisted chiefly in his being aware that when turnips were good the partridges lay better in them, and that when fences were well kept, he found wounded birds in them the sooner, and was less likely to tumble off when riding at them. The cheers were famous. A great melting away of guests took place, none being left but Lady Estcourt.
— Weather howled again all night and nearly all day. Addresses have poured in-50 tenants dined at the Arms, Papa and Charles Mathews, etc., spoke : M., girls, J., and I came in for a little while to hear them. Charles wisely took the facetious line, as it was plain enough the stolid party wd have been entirely unmoved by any expressions of feeling. As it was, some of them laughed till they were purple, when he said his knowledge of farming consisted chiefly in his being aware that when turnips were good the partridges lay better in them, and that when fences were well kept, he found wounded birds in them the sooner, and was less likely to tumble off when riding at them. The cheers were famous. A great melting away of guests took place, none being left but Lady Estcourt.
29Oct1863, A Gentlemen's Dinner
HAGLEY, Thursday, October 29th, 1863.
—The kind weather, which I do think I shall never abuse again, having done all that could be expected of it, and more, naturally gave way to its feelings to-day, and we had a most astonishing howl of wind and rain nearly all the morning. But nothing happened to-day except a highly successful and delightful dinner at Halesowen, to which went all the gentlemen except Lord Wenlock and Ralph Neville, who stayed at home and squired us. They all came home about 11½ in tremendous spirits, everyone having spoken, except John ; Albert returned thanks for Granny ! Uncle W. excelled himself, and was full of praise of Charles' speech (saying he had the making of a good speaker, which I note down for the benefit of futurity) ; Mr. Ross and Ld. J. Hervey both spoke capitally ; in short all was charming. To-day went away Braybrooks, and Ric., I think.
—The kind weather, which I do think I shall never abuse again, having done all that could be expected of it, and more, naturally gave way to its feelings to-day, and we had a most astonishing howl of wind and rain nearly all the morning. But nothing happened to-day except a highly successful and delightful dinner at Halesowen, to which went all the gentlemen except Lord Wenlock and Ralph Neville, who stayed at home and squired us. They all came home about 11½ in tremendous spirits, everyone having spoken, except John ; Albert returned thanks for Granny ! Uncle W. excelled himself, and was full of praise of Charles' speech (saying he had the making of a good speaker, which I note down for the benefit of futurity) ; Mr. Ross and Ld. J. Hervey both spoke capitally ; in short all was charming. To-day went away Braybrooks, and Ric., I think.
28Oct1863, More Celebrations
HAGLEY, Wednesday, October 28th, 1863. SS. Simon and Jude.
—Old Nevy's birthday ; like Charles, he spends it at home for the 1st time since he went to school, 10 years ago. The weather was exactly what one wanted ; bright and pleasant, with gleams of sunshine breaking out. Breakfast was rather promiscuous, between 10 and 11, everybody appeared in high spirits, and delighted with last night's success. Church at 11½, with about 40 people ! which was very nice to see, after a ball.
The labourers' dinner, which included all, in and out of the parish, who work for tenants, was at 1. 250 men were the numbers. Capn. Wolrige spoke very well, proposing C.'s health, and presented an excellent address, signed by nearly all the parish : Chs. responded in another excellent little speech, and thanked good old Dilworth for a splendid basket of fruit. Then Uncle Wm. got up to give Papa's health, which he did most beautifully, speaking of the one terrible shadow over all this joyful time ; Papa's answer dwelt upon it for a little while in a way that moved and overcame me indeed ! but I was so glad that her dear name was not left out at such a time as this, when the longing for her presence—for her to be there if only once to smile upon her boy whom she wd have been so proud of —was so deep in one's heart. The one thing wanting : surely meant to draw our thoughts upward where she is, and remind us of the better things, when we might be rejoicing overmuch in all this earthly pride and happiness. Oh, darling Mammie, you may have looked down upon him ! you may have been praying for him with the pure prayer of those who are with Christ !
After this, all went to the park for games, which were very successful, and then came the poor women's tea, most comfortable, amusing, and satisfactory. Great was the delight when Uncle William dandled a twarly Meredith twin, and made it quite good ; also my telling them all they were each to drink 10 cups of tea was reckoned an excellent joke. Kind At. Yaddy and I marched off to the lodge with a jug of tea, 4 pieces of cake, 6 (I think) bits of bread and butter, about 8 slices of meat and 13 lumps of sugar, for Mary Page and Widow Read, who couldn't get to the Arms. Fire balloons and red and blue lights came off at night, and the perron (the hideousness of whose ball-awning was quite made up for by evergreens, flowers, and flags) looked lovely with innumerable little lamps. Our huge horse-shoe dinner went off with éclat, as did the evening spent in the hall and billiard-room, enlivened by At. Y's singing. I gave old Nevy a print, at sight of which he fell on my neck with a burst of affection !
—Old Nevy's birthday ; like Charles, he spends it at home for the 1st time since he went to school, 10 years ago. The weather was exactly what one wanted ; bright and pleasant, with gleams of sunshine breaking out. Breakfast was rather promiscuous, between 10 and 11, everybody appeared in high spirits, and delighted with last night's success. Church at 11½, with about 40 people ! which was very nice to see, after a ball.
The labourers' dinner, which included all, in and out of the parish, who work for tenants, was at 1. 250 men were the numbers. Capn. Wolrige spoke very well, proposing C.'s health, and presented an excellent address, signed by nearly all the parish : Chs. responded in another excellent little speech, and thanked good old Dilworth for a splendid basket of fruit. Then Uncle Wm. got up to give Papa's health, which he did most beautifully, speaking of the one terrible shadow over all this joyful time ; Papa's answer dwelt upon it for a little while in a way that moved and overcame me indeed ! but I was so glad that her dear name was not left out at such a time as this, when the longing for her presence—for her to be there if only once to smile upon her boy whom she wd have been so proud of —was so deep in one's heart. The one thing wanting : surely meant to draw our thoughts upward where she is, and remind us of the better things, when we might be rejoicing overmuch in all this earthly pride and happiness. Oh, darling Mammie, you may have looked down upon him ! you may have been praying for him with the pure prayer of those who are with Christ !
After this, all went to the park for games, which were very successful, and then came the poor women's tea, most comfortable, amusing, and satisfactory. Great was the delight when Uncle William dandled a twarly Meredith twin, and made it quite good ; also my telling them all they were each to drink 10 cups of tea was reckoned an excellent joke. Kind At. Yaddy and I marched off to the lodge with a jug of tea, 4 pieces of cake, 6 (I think) bits of bread and butter, about 8 slices of meat and 13 lumps of sugar, for Mary Page and Widow Read, who couldn't get to the Arms. Fire balloons and red and blue lights came off at night, and the perron (the hideousness of whose ball-awning was quite made up for by evergreens, flowers, and flags) looked lovely with innumerable little lamps. Our huge horse-shoe dinner went off with éclat, as did the evening spent in the hall and billiard-room, enlivened by At. Y's singing. I gave old Nevy a print, at sight of which he fell on my neck with a burst of affection !
Thursday, January 01, 2009
27Oct1863, Charles Turns 21
HAGLEY, Tuesday, October 27th, 1863.
—A red-letter day, adding to the many that shine out at intervals through my life. Not that it was by any means a day of unmixed enjoyment ; on the contrary, I don't think I began really to enjoy myself (such was one's anxiety) till after midnight ! But it was a day of deep thankfulness, and awakened bright hopes for the future. The events that happened to mark dear old Charles' birthday were guns fired early in the morning ; a procession of the school with garlands and flags to the back of the house, where they sung, and an address to Papa was read by Stephens ; wine and cake were given to all the children at the school ; and finally a ball given to all the county (about 500), including the Duc and Duchesse d'Aumale and the Prince de Condé. We received in the hall and the billiard-room : danced in the gallery and drawing-room : supper in the dining-room, tea in the library, Papa's two rooms cloakrooms. There arrived to-day Wenlocks, Braybrookes, Neville Grenvilles, Mrs. Charles Robartes, and, to sleep in the village, Lord John Manners, Ld. John Hervey, Messrs. C. and H. Wynne, Ross (the gt rifle shot), Stopford Selfe and Stewart. Also C. Robartes slept out. At the school was Charles's first speech, my first time of hearing him : his opening sentence was enough to relieve one's fright as to how he wd do it. It was really perfect : simple and to the point, forgetting no one, and just the right length. One word about Papa my wretched head has managed to retain. After saying something of desire to be like him, "not that I can hope to emulate him, for who could?" The simplicity of this made it so much better than a long compliment. After this had ended with tremendous cheers from all the children, some of us went to church, where the Psalms for the day spoke to one's feelings at the time, as they always do in every marked circumstance of life. The 126th, 127th, and 128th psalms put into words all that could come into one's heart about Papa, and left one with a happy trust that the blessings there spoken of would long be his. "Blessed are all they that fear the Lord, and walk in His ways."
The monster dinner of 38 people came off at six : we had to sit round the room at a horseshoe table ! In the middle of it arrived the Wenlocks ; about 9½ the guests began to arrive ; old Meriel helped me to receive them, and looked so handsome in her lace. The Royal people came early, and were established on a little dais opposite the fireplace in the gallery. The Duc was exceedingly gracious and pleasant : in the first Quadrille he and I danced, Charles with the Duchesse vis-Ã -vis ; the Prince de Conde proved to be very pleasant and conversible too ; talked a good deal about his dislike of having to go for his "stoodees to ze continent," and so missing the season ; and announced that he was quite an Englishman, except as to politics. "How should I be elsewise ?" I couldn't help thinking his English might have been a little less unmistakably French, therefore ! Till supper, I was a little unhappy : the room grew terribly hot and the crowd certainly was ; but everybody seemed exceedingly jovial. We went in state to supper at 12 ; the Royalties had a round table apart under the middle window, where was a small platform. Papa, At. Yaddy, Granny, Atie. P. , and I sat down with them and I suppose about 200 people squeezed into the room, the rest remaining in the drawing-room, and as many as possible in the doorway. In progress of time, the Duke mounted the platform and made an excellent speech proposing Charles's health, very fluent and graceful, in spite of the strongest French accent ; and then dear old Charles got up, and stood for some minutes while everybody cheered him. He did look grand, with his face softened by feeling, and a little paler than usual. He spoke slowly, especially when what he said moved them, and there was a manly modesty about his manner that went straight to one's heart. He thanked them all most heartily, and then dwelt really beautifully on how he felt that he owed their kindness entirely to their love for Papa, reserving nothing for himself, and how he knew he cd say nothing stronger than that he hoped to follow his example. Spoke of hoping soon to know them all, and of always remembering their kindness. Oh dear ! if I cd but remember it all ! It was such real happiness to hear him give expression to such deep and true feeling : I always instinctively felt that he had it in his heart, but his reserve is so great that he has hardly ever spoken out anything of the sort, and now to hear him say he rejoiced to be able "thus publically and emphatically" to express his sense of all Papa's example was to him, and his hope that he should prove himself not altogether unworthy of it, was an overpowering joy to me. . . . I went out of the room with a light heart indeed ! but had a blow in missing Papa's speech, which was unexpected, Ld. Dudley giving his health after we had marched out. It was beautiful, all say who heard it. The last guests got away about 1/4 4, and the happy, successful end of everything rubbed out all the previous anxieties, and I can only repeat that it was a red-letter day.
—A red-letter day, adding to the many that shine out at intervals through my life. Not that it was by any means a day of unmixed enjoyment ; on the contrary, I don't think I began really to enjoy myself (such was one's anxiety) till after midnight ! But it was a day of deep thankfulness, and awakened bright hopes for the future. The events that happened to mark dear old Charles' birthday were guns fired early in the morning ; a procession of the school with garlands and flags to the back of the house, where they sung, and an address to Papa was read by Stephens ; wine and cake were given to all the children at the school ; and finally a ball given to all the county (about 500), including the Duc and Duchesse d'Aumale and the Prince de Condé. We received in the hall and the billiard-room : danced in the gallery and drawing-room : supper in the dining-room, tea in the library, Papa's two rooms cloakrooms. There arrived to-day Wenlocks, Braybrookes, Neville Grenvilles, Mrs. Charles Robartes, and, to sleep in the village, Lord John Manners, Ld. John Hervey, Messrs. C. and H. Wynne, Ross (the gt rifle shot), Stopford Selfe and Stewart. Also C. Robartes slept out. At the school was Charles's first speech, my first time of hearing him : his opening sentence was enough to relieve one's fright as to how he wd do it. It was really perfect : simple and to the point, forgetting no one, and just the right length. One word about Papa my wretched head has managed to retain. After saying something of desire to be like him, "not that I can hope to emulate him, for who could?" The simplicity of this made it so much better than a long compliment. After this had ended with tremendous cheers from all the children, some of us went to church, where the Psalms for the day spoke to one's feelings at the time, as they always do in every marked circumstance of life. The 126th, 127th, and 128th psalms put into words all that could come into one's heart about Papa, and left one with a happy trust that the blessings there spoken of would long be his. "Blessed are all they that fear the Lord, and walk in His ways."
The monster dinner of 38 people came off at six : we had to sit round the room at a horseshoe table ! In the middle of it arrived the Wenlocks ; about 9½ the guests began to arrive ; old Meriel helped me to receive them, and looked so handsome in her lace. The Royal people came early, and were established on a little dais opposite the fireplace in the gallery. The Duc was exceedingly gracious and pleasant : in the first Quadrille he and I danced, Charles with the Duchesse vis-Ã -vis ; the Prince de Conde proved to be very pleasant and conversible too ; talked a good deal about his dislike of having to go for his "stoodees to ze continent," and so missing the season ; and announced that he was quite an Englishman, except as to politics. "How should I be elsewise ?" I couldn't help thinking his English might have been a little less unmistakably French, therefore ! Till supper, I was a little unhappy : the room grew terribly hot and the crowd certainly was ; but everybody seemed exceedingly jovial. We went in state to supper at 12 ; the Royalties had a round table apart under the middle window, where was a small platform. Papa, At. Yaddy, Granny, Atie. P. , and I sat down with them and I suppose about 200 people squeezed into the room, the rest remaining in the drawing-room, and as many as possible in the doorway. In progress of time, the Duke mounted the platform and made an excellent speech proposing Charles's health, very fluent and graceful, in spite of the strongest French accent ; and then dear old Charles got up, and stood for some minutes while everybody cheered him. He did look grand, with his face softened by feeling, and a little paler than usual. He spoke slowly, especially when what he said moved them, and there was a manly modesty about his manner that went straight to one's heart. He thanked them all most heartily, and then dwelt really beautifully on how he felt that he owed their kindness entirely to their love for Papa, reserving nothing for himself, and how he knew he cd say nothing stronger than that he hoped to follow his example. Spoke of hoping soon to know them all, and of always remembering their kindness. Oh dear ! if I cd but remember it all ! It was such real happiness to hear him give expression to such deep and true feeling : I always instinctively felt that he had it in his heart, but his reserve is so great that he has hardly ever spoken out anything of the sort, and now to hear him say he rejoiced to be able "thus publically and emphatically" to express his sense of all Papa's example was to him, and his hope that he should prove himself not altogether unworthy of it, was an overpowering joy to me. . . . I went out of the room with a light heart indeed ! but had a blow in missing Papa's speech, which was unexpected, Ld. Dudley giving his health after we had marched out. It was beautiful, all say who heard it. The last guests got away about 1/4 4, and the happy, successful end of everything rubbed out all the previous anxieties, and I can only repeat that it was a red-letter day.
26Oct1863, Mrs. Gladstone in Mama's Room
HAGLEY, Monday, October 26th, 1863.
—Raw yellow fog. Ld. George and Ric. Quin, Atie. P. and Agnes, Uncles Stephen and Henry and the 5 boys came. I stayed in to get rid of the end of my cold. Ld. George [FN: Lord George Quin married Lady Georgiana Spencer, sister of Sarah, Lady Lyttelton.] has never been here since before Meriel's birth.
Atie. Pussy is in the dear room, never used till now since the night when our darling [FN: Lady Frederick's mother, Lady Lyttelton.] rested there in her arms and then passed to the blessed repose of the Everlasting Arms.
—Raw yellow fog. Ld. George and Ric. Quin, Atie. P. and Agnes, Uncles Stephen and Henry and the 5 boys came. I stayed in to get rid of the end of my cold. Ld. George [FN: Lord George Quin married Lady Georgiana Spencer, sister of Sarah, Lady Lyttelton.] has never been here since before Meriel's birth.
Atie. Pussy is in the dear room, never used till now since the night when our darling [FN: Lady Frederick's mother, Lady Lyttelton.] rested there in her arms and then passed to the blessed repose of the Everlasting Arms.
23Oct1863, A walk with Aunt Yaddy
HAGLEY, Friday, October 23rd, 1863.
—Slight morning frost, but became very mild : a profoundly still, hazy day. I walked with At. Y. (Adelaide Seymour) We were audience to two splendid triumphal arches in the avenue.
—Slight morning frost, but became very mild : a profoundly still, hazy day. I walked with At. Y. (Adelaide Seymour) We were audience to two splendid triumphal arches in the avenue.
19Oct1863, More Preparations
HAGLEY, Monday, October 19th, 1863.
—Most delightfully soft and warm, though cloudy all day. I went to Birmingham, after oilcloth, satin shoes, blotting-books, winter jackets for the girls, and a print for Nevy. The gallery floor begins to assume a lovely light toffee hue, by dint of rubbing. At. Yaddy came. It's odd to see her here in autumn, and without her little couple, who are recruiting at Brighton. She is full of the departure of the Spencers, who have set off for Egypt with Tallee, he having not recovered all his strength after inflammation of the lungs. Thus we lose the three people we most wanted for the do-ment (Mary Page's forcible word for doings). Letters : fr Albert and Bob. I missed Church.
—Most delightfully soft and warm, though cloudy all day. I went to Birmingham, after oilcloth, satin shoes, blotting-books, winter jackets for the girls, and a print for Nevy. The gallery floor begins to assume a lovely light toffee hue, by dint of rubbing. At. Yaddy came. It's odd to see her here in autumn, and without her little couple, who are recruiting at Brighton. She is full of the departure of the Spencers, who have set off for Egypt with Tallee, he having not recovered all his strength after inflammation of the lungs. Thus we lose the three people we most wanted for the do-ment (Mary Page's forcible word for doings). Letters : fr Albert and Bob. I missed Church.
15Oct1863, Getting Ready
HAGLEY, Thursday, October 15th, 1863.
—The billiard-room was transformed into an elegant Louis XV "salon," with the drawing-room furniture, china, etc. Gallery emptied and uncarpeted. A little parochial toddle with May.
—The billiard-room was transformed into an elegant Louis XV "salon," with the drawing-room furniture, china, etc. Gallery emptied and uncarpeted. A little parochial toddle with May.
13Oct1863, Step-carpetums and ball-chairums
HAGLEY, Tuesday, October 13th, 1863.
—A good deal of rain : still mild. Big club day. It's pleasant to see these girls come back as cheerfully and heartily to their work after such a holyday. The sort of thing that used to try me beyond anything ! Cong. [FN: I.e., congregation at church, exclusive of Hall and Rectory.] 2. Girls, Miss M., and I took pudding to Mrs. Burford, and visited the Stringers' new house. Paperums, perron-awning-ums, step-carpetums, ball-chairums, stableums.
—A good deal of rain : still mild. Big club day. It's pleasant to see these girls come back as cheerfully and heartily to their work after such a holyday. The sort of thing that used to try me beyond anything ! Cong. [FN: I.e., congregation at church, exclusive of Hall and Rectory.] 2. Girls, Miss M., and I took pudding to Mrs. Burford, and visited the Stringers' new house. Paperums, perron-awning-ums, step-carpetums, ball-chairums, stableums.
01Oct1863, Guizot's Charles I
HAGLEY, Thursday, October 1st, 1863.
—I translated and finished Guizot's " Charles I," finding myself as much moved at the account of the King's death as I was on reading it in Clarendon 9 or 10 years ago, although I do now see, very unwillingly, the faults of the Royal martyr.
—I translated and finished Guizot's " Charles I," finding myself as much moved at the account of the King's death as I was on reading it in Clarendon 9 or 10 years ago, although I do now see, very unwillingly, the faults of the Royal martyr.
26Sep1863, Mobs and Riots
HAGLEY, Saturday, September 26th, 1863.
—Lovely golden day, with a few heavy showers, after a night lit up with a harvest moon that dazzled one to look at. I saw a little black cloud, just like an armed man, march up to her in a threatening manner, and vanish into nothing on coming within the influence of her pure and steadfast rays.
To dinner came Sir Th. Philips : disturbances, mobs, and riots were talked of ; and Charles and I showed our ring at recollecting something about the Chartist riots in '48 ; especially how we were sent into the Green Park as likely to be a quiet place, and how yells in the distance drove us home in double quick time. Also there is an impression on both our minds of a bludgeon ; not unnaturally, as Papa was a Special Constable.
—Lovely golden day, with a few heavy showers, after a night lit up with a harvest moon that dazzled one to look at. I saw a little black cloud, just like an armed man, march up to her in a threatening manner, and vanish into nothing on coming within the influence of her pure and steadfast rays.
To dinner came Sir Th. Philips : disturbances, mobs, and riots were talked of ; and Charles and I showed our ring at recollecting something about the Chartist riots in '48 ; especially how we were sent into the Green Park as likely to be a quiet place, and how yells in the distance drove us home in double quick time. Also there is an impression on both our minds of a bludgeon ; not unnaturally, as Papa was a Special Constable.
19Sep1863, Reading Shakespeare
HAGLEY, Saturday, September 19th, 1863.
—Began "Henry VIII" with Arthur who likes both poetry in general and Shakespeare in particular.
—Began "Henry VIII" with Arthur who likes both poetry in general and Shakespeare in particular.
18Sep1863, Sankoo
HAGLEY, Friday, September 18th, 1863.
—Busy most of the morning after church in going over the rooms with Elly : we shall be 30 in the house, besides servants, if we live till dread October. Played at billiards with At. E. and afterwards walked parochially with her. Took a partridge to Mrs. Stringer, who held up her hands in speechless bliss before bursting into gratitude —poor old body. Met sweet Mary and Annie Herbert in their little white sun-bonnets, out of which they look at one with shining open eyes of a kind peculiar, I think, to tiny maidens under 5. Said their new sister was to be called Lucy. "Is baby well?" "Ess, sankoo." Also took pudding to the Mrs. Meredith with twins, which have both lived after all.
—Busy most of the morning after church in going over the rooms with Elly : we shall be 30 in the house, besides servants, if we live till dread October. Played at billiards with At. E. and afterwards walked parochially with her. Took a partridge to Mrs. Stringer, who held up her hands in speechless bliss before bursting into gratitude —poor old body. Met sweet Mary and Annie Herbert in their little white sun-bonnets, out of which they look at one with shining open eyes of a kind peculiar, I think, to tiny maidens under 5. Said their new sister was to be called Lucy. "Is baby well?" "Ess, sankoo." Also took pudding to the Mrs. Meredith with twins, which have both lived after all.
16Sep1863, Sedate Pleasures
HAGLEY, Wednesday, September 16th, 1863.
—Fine, serene, mild day. At. Coque, Lavinia, and May set out for "Orchard Neville" (late Baltonsborough) en route for Antony ; whose name recalls to me one of the very happiest and merriest weeks in my life. I think these girls much enjoy the prospect, but they enjoy things (especially Lava) as grown-up people do, to whom life has a little outgrown its freshness : take events and pleasures, I mean, with sedateness ; I have never seen them really carried off their legs with excitement, or anything like it. And this is a little sad at their age. Poor pussy's [FN: Lavinia] head discomforts account for a good deal, no doubt.
—Fine, serene, mild day. At. Coque, Lavinia, and May set out for "Orchard Neville" (late Baltonsborough) en route for Antony ; whose name recalls to me one of the very happiest and merriest weeks in my life. I think these girls much enjoy the prospect, but they enjoy things (especially Lava) as grown-up people do, to whom life has a little outgrown its freshness : take events and pleasures, I mean, with sedateness ; I have never seen them really carried off their legs with excitement, or anything like it. And this is a little sad at their age. Poor pussy's [FN: Lavinia] head discomforts account for a good deal, no doubt.
14Sep1863, My First Waiting Ends
HAGLEY, Monday, September 14th, 1863.
—And so it is over ! I almost feel as if I had spent a fortnight here. It is peaceful and pleasant indeed to think I have gone through my first waiting and really without a rub. The Queen was to go to Balmoral this evening, but we were allowed to go early. Got home in time for dinner. We did certainly make a noise ! and the evening was a funny contrast to my last four.
—And so it is over ! I almost feel as if I had spent a fortnight here. It is peaceful and pleasant indeed to think I have gone through my first waiting and really without a rub. The Queen was to go to Balmoral this evening, but we were allowed to go early. Got home in time for dinner. We did certainly make a noise ! and the evening was a funny contrast to my last four.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
13Sep1863, Going to Chapel Bonnetless
WINDSOR, 15th Sunday after Trinity, September 13th, 1863.
—Serene mild day. Having reached the top of the tree as to great houses, I find here no exception to my reflection made at Cliveden, that magnificent places have shocking Church arrangements. In the 1st place, it is startling to one's feelings to go to a Sunday service in a chapel bonnetless, as the household have to do here. No chanting, except in very bad style to the responses to the Commandments, disagreeable tunes to inferior hymns, sung in a drawl, and the Morning Service divided in two, which last plan has, I know, many advantages, but not to a strong person whom the longest service cannot tire. The Queen, Prince Alfred, and all the children attended the first half alone ; and 3 carriages were used during the day. One wishes (I fear vainly) that something cd lead the Queen to find comfort in that most consoling and peace-giving thing—our Church's Liturgy—that thereby she might be helped and strengthened on her desolate way. How the words in the Psalm went to one's heart—"He is the Father of the fatherless, and defendeth the cause of the widows." Well, we must trust our Queen to Him, and His Loving Wisdom. He has answered many prayers for her ! I walked with Lady Ely again in the garden, and ended, to my refreshment, at S. George's ; anthem, a spirited, florid one, "When Israel came out of Egypt." Mr. Ellison preacht in the noon-day half of the Chapel service, on Hades and death. I was told it was possible I should dine with the Queen, but it was not so. The evening was lightened by ivory letters. [FN: I.e. I (John Baily, editor) suppose a game played with ivory letters.] I think I must have met the pick of the Court for pleasantness and kindness.
—Serene mild day. Having reached the top of the tree as to great houses, I find here no exception to my reflection made at Cliveden, that magnificent places have shocking Church arrangements. In the 1st place, it is startling to one's feelings to go to a Sunday service in a chapel bonnetless, as the household have to do here. No chanting, except in very bad style to the responses to the Commandments, disagreeable tunes to inferior hymns, sung in a drawl, and the Morning Service divided in two, which last plan has, I know, many advantages, but not to a strong person whom the longest service cannot tire. The Queen, Prince Alfred, and all the children attended the first half alone ; and 3 carriages were used during the day. One wishes (I fear vainly) that something cd lead the Queen to find comfort in that most consoling and peace-giving thing—our Church's Liturgy—that thereby she might be helped and strengthened on her desolate way. How the words in the Psalm went to one's heart—"He is the Father of the fatherless, and defendeth the cause of the widows." Well, we must trust our Queen to Him, and His Loving Wisdom. He has answered many prayers for her ! I walked with Lady Ely again in the garden, and ended, to my refreshment, at S. George's ; anthem, a spirited, florid one, "When Israel came out of Egypt." Mr. Ellison preacht in the noon-day half of the Chapel service, on Hades and death. I was told it was possible I should dine with the Queen, but it was not so. The evening was lightened by ivory letters. [FN: I.e. I (John Baily, editor) suppose a game played with ivory letters.] I think I must have met the pick of the Court for pleasantness and kindness.
12Sep1863, Beginning to Like Court Life
WINDSOR, Saturday, September 12th, 1863.
—Fine, but rather misty and Novembery. I have got rid of "les vapeurs" and begin rather to like Court life ! I asked leave to go to S. George's in the morning (more like a peggy than ever ! " Please'm, may I go out for an hour ? "). Little I thought on the great marriage day when I shd next be in the glorious Chapel ! The singing lovely. Anthem, "0 sing joyfully," not very pretty. Then came my own room. At luncheon were several Privy Councillors. Ld. Palmerston, his beauty much impaired by particularly bad slate-coloured false teeth, the D. of Newcastle, looking ill, Ld. Granville, Sir George Grey, Sir Andrew Buchanan. Horatia rode with Prss. Helena and P. Arthur. The Queen went, unattended, to plant a new oak in the place of Herne's oak, which has lately fallen. I walked with Ly. Ely from 5 till 4 to 7 : she sent a cold chill through me by saying I shd very likely dine with the Queen to-morrow. Sir T. Biddulph and Ly. Augusta Bruce dined : Ly. Biddulph came in the evening. The same party, transposing Sir Thomas for Gen. Seymour, played whist. Prss. Louise sent for Horatia, and cried and sobbed at the thoughts of losing her on Monday, after their long bit at Osborne together. The same soft heart and quick affections that Granny found in the elder ones. Letters : fr. Papa, Atie. P., Meriel. To Atie. P., At. C. and At. Yaddy. The sentries presented arms to Ly. Ely and me ! misled by the Queen's little dog, who was with us, and who doubtless took all the honour to himself.
—Fine, but rather misty and Novembery. I have got rid of "les vapeurs" and begin rather to like Court life ! I asked leave to go to S. George's in the morning (more like a peggy than ever ! " Please'm, may I go out for an hour ? "). Little I thought on the great marriage day when I shd next be in the glorious Chapel ! The singing lovely. Anthem, "0 sing joyfully," not very pretty. Then came my own room. At luncheon were several Privy Councillors. Ld. Palmerston, his beauty much impaired by particularly bad slate-coloured false teeth, the D. of Newcastle, looking ill, Ld. Granville, Sir George Grey, Sir Andrew Buchanan. Horatia rode with Prss. Helena and P. Arthur. The Queen went, unattended, to plant a new oak in the place of Herne's oak, which has lately fallen. I walked with Ly. Ely from 5 till 4 to 7 : she sent a cold chill through me by saying I shd very likely dine with the Queen to-morrow. Sir T. Biddulph and Ly. Augusta Bruce dined : Ly. Biddulph came in the evening. The same party, transposing Sir Thomas for Gen. Seymour, played whist. Prss. Louise sent for Horatia, and cried and sobbed at the thoughts of losing her on Monday, after their long bit at Osborne together. The same soft heart and quick affections that Granny found in the elder ones. Letters : fr. Papa, Atie. P., Meriel. To Atie. P., At. C. and At. Yaddy. The sentries presented arms to Ly. Ely and me ! misled by the Queen's little dog, who was with us, and who doubtless took all the honour to himself.
11Sep1863, Poor Peggies
WINDSOR, Friday, September 11th, 1863.
—Oh dear, I shall sympathize for the rest of my life with poor peggies [FN: I.e. maidservants.] launched at their first place ! To-day has taught me what it is to "feel strange." I am not naturally shy ; and the actual bathing-feel has pretty nearly gone off, but I am unked and forlorn, in spite of everybody's kindness. Ly. Ely took me to the kennels (mem. 16 puppies), the lovely dairy, and to Frogmore, where the mausoleum, which does so jar upon one's English feelings, is still being worked at. The Queen goes there daily. Ly. Ely told me much that was interesting the while. After breakfast we were in the corridor, when the Queen came in with the children. Prss. Louise brought little darling Prss. Beatrice up to me and I kissed her tiny hand. She is not pretty, but has a dear little intelligent face. The little Princes were at the kennels in the aftn, when Miss Stopford and I passed. They called, and we joined them. Prince Arthur is very handsome, if only he looked more like 13 years old ; but he is wonderfully small. Prince Leopold has a funny, waggish face, with the brightest blue eyes ; he is miserably thin and puny, though they think him stronger : Lady Caroline Barrington told me the doctors hardly expect him to live—poor darling ! Miss Stopford told me much about Prss. Louise, whom she has been with at Osborne. H.R.H. seems to be rather naughty, with a mischievous will of her own ; draws beautifully.
Miss S. and I had a pleasant walk, seeing the old porter at the garden gate, and the tombstone to the memory of a magpie he loved. I was afraid the dinner wd be worse than last night, as Miss S. (who begs me to call her Horatia) and Ly. Ely dined with the Queen ; but it was not dreadful ; I had to sweep down the stately interminable corridor all by myself to dinner ; but luckily caught Ly. Caroline. In the evening, Gen. Grey and I, Ly. C. and Gen. Seymour played at whist ! which made the time go pleasantly.
—Oh dear, I shall sympathize for the rest of my life with poor peggies [FN: I.e. maidservants.] launched at their first place ! To-day has taught me what it is to "feel strange." I am not naturally shy ; and the actual bathing-feel has pretty nearly gone off, but I am unked and forlorn, in spite of everybody's kindness. Ly. Ely took me to the kennels (mem. 16 puppies), the lovely dairy, and to Frogmore, where the mausoleum, which does so jar upon one's English feelings, is still being worked at. The Queen goes there daily. Ly. Ely told me much that was interesting the while. After breakfast we were in the corridor, when the Queen came in with the children. Prss. Louise brought little darling Prss. Beatrice up to me and I kissed her tiny hand. She is not pretty, but has a dear little intelligent face. The little Princes were at the kennels in the aftn, when Miss Stopford and I passed. They called, and we joined them. Prince Arthur is very handsome, if only he looked more like 13 years old ; but he is wonderfully small. Prince Leopold has a funny, waggish face, with the brightest blue eyes ; he is miserably thin and puny, though they think him stronger : Lady Caroline Barrington told me the doctors hardly expect him to live—poor darling ! Miss Stopford told me much about Prss. Louise, whom she has been with at Osborne. H.R.H. seems to be rather naughty, with a mischievous will of her own ; draws beautifully.
Miss S. and I had a pleasant walk, seeing the old porter at the garden gate, and the tombstone to the memory of a magpie he loved. I was afraid the dinner wd be worse than last night, as Miss S. (who begs me to call her Horatia) and Ly. Ely dined with the Queen ; but it was not dreadful ; I had to sweep down the stately interminable corridor all by myself to dinner ; but luckily caught Ly. Caroline. In the evening, Gen. Grey and I, Ly. C. and Gen. Seymour played at whist ! which made the time go pleasantly.
10Sep1863, First Day as Maid-of-Honour
WINDSOR, Thursday, September 10th, 1863.
—The much-to-be-remembered day of my first entering upon Maid-of-Honour duties. I left Hagley at 9, inside out with bathing-feel, reached London in time for a scramble of indispensable shopping, and thence to Windsor, which looked noble and ethereal, bathed in hazy sunset light, as we came in sight of it. I was shown up to 2 snug little rooms by a comfortable old body, and soon made the acquaintance of Miss Stopford and Miss Kerr, who came to me. They are both together here by some mistake ; but it is very pleasant for me. Miss Stopford has won my heart, and I wish she was to be my colleague (Miss Cathcart, a dread being, is to be). They were most kind, comforting me by declaring my clothes all right. Lady Ely next came in, and took me to Ly. Caroline Barrington, and next I saw Lady Augusta Bruce for a few minutes. All kind and comfortable. I was prepared for finding the dinner and evening silent and stiff ; but it was much better than I expected. Present, Lady Ely, the two above named Maids-of-Honour, Lord Caithness, General Seymour, Colonel Liddell, Major Cowell, M. Buff, Major Elphinstone. The Queen dines apart now. The sotto-voce conversation on very Courtly and regal subjects was impressive ! And I confess I was also impressed by the 8 noiseless servants and indeed by all I saw. 0 the dignity and beauty of the corridor and rooms ! After dinner, Miss S. and Miss C. having disappeared, I was sitting alone with Ly. Ely, when one of the noiseless servants came and said : " Her Majesty desires your Ladyship to bring Miss Lyttelton into the corridor." So kind Ly. Ely put my arm in hers, and I went, trembling. The Queen came forward from the end of the corridor, and gave me her hand with all the grace and gentle dignity of old times. And 0 what it was to kiss her hand again, for the first time since I saw her at the height of her happiness, without so much as a shadow cast before by the dark sorrow in store for her ! I can't exactly tell what it is in her face which is altered, for she looks well ; but she has gained an expression which there used not to be : her grief has set its stamp there, but so as to refine and ennoble it. Her sweet and kindly smile went to my heart. She asked after Granny, Papa, At. Coque, and "Meriel," saying of the latter, " She has two children, has she not ? " Said more than once that I was like Mamma, but also like Aunt Lavinia. Lady Ely said I was nervous; the Queen said smiling, "Nervous ! 0 no ; she will soon get over that," or words to that effect. She then beckoned up the 2 Princesses who were with her ; they both kissed me. Prss. Louise is very pretty—Prss. Helena asked after " Laddle " [FN: Lady Lyttelton, Lady Frederick's grandmother.] — Prince Alfred was in the distance (grown rather fat), also pretty Prince Arthur. The interview lasted only a few minutes ; but after it was over, I shd have liked nothing better than rushing off somewhere and having a good cry ; instead of which I had to go back in a very tremulous state to the solemn drawing-room, where we sat round a table the rest of the evening, and were rather dull. I went to bed tired with excitement.
—The much-to-be-remembered day of my first entering upon Maid-of-Honour duties. I left Hagley at 9, inside out with bathing-feel, reached London in time for a scramble of indispensable shopping, and thence to Windsor, which looked noble and ethereal, bathed in hazy sunset light, as we came in sight of it. I was shown up to 2 snug little rooms by a comfortable old body, and soon made the acquaintance of Miss Stopford and Miss Kerr, who came to me. They are both together here by some mistake ; but it is very pleasant for me. Miss Stopford has won my heart, and I wish she was to be my colleague (Miss Cathcart, a dread being, is to be). They were most kind, comforting me by declaring my clothes all right. Lady Ely next came in, and took me to Ly. Caroline Barrington, and next I saw Lady Augusta Bruce for a few minutes. All kind and comfortable. I was prepared for finding the dinner and evening silent and stiff ; but it was much better than I expected. Present, Lady Ely, the two above named Maids-of-Honour, Lord Caithness, General Seymour, Colonel Liddell, Major Cowell, M. Buff, Major Elphinstone. The Queen dines apart now. The sotto-voce conversation on very Courtly and regal subjects was impressive ! And I confess I was also impressed by the 8 noiseless servants and indeed by all I saw. 0 the dignity and beauty of the corridor and rooms ! After dinner, Miss S. and Miss C. having disappeared, I was sitting alone with Ly. Ely, when one of the noiseless servants came and said : " Her Majesty desires your Ladyship to bring Miss Lyttelton into the corridor." So kind Ly. Ely put my arm in hers, and I went, trembling. The Queen came forward from the end of the corridor, and gave me her hand with all the grace and gentle dignity of old times. And 0 what it was to kiss her hand again, for the first time since I saw her at the height of her happiness, without so much as a shadow cast before by the dark sorrow in store for her ! I can't exactly tell what it is in her face which is altered, for she looks well ; but she has gained an expression which there used not to be : her grief has set its stamp there, but so as to refine and ennoble it. Her sweet and kindly smile went to my heart. She asked after Granny, Papa, At. Coque, and "Meriel," saying of the latter, " She has two children, has she not ? " Said more than once that I was like Mamma, but also like Aunt Lavinia. Lady Ely said I was nervous; the Queen said smiling, "Nervous ! 0 no ; she will soon get over that," or words to that effect. She then beckoned up the 2 Princesses who were with her ; they both kissed me. Prss. Louise is very pretty—Prss. Helena asked after " Laddle " [FN: Lady Lyttelton, Lady Frederick's grandmother.] — Prince Alfred was in the distance (grown rather fat), also pretty Prince Arthur. The interview lasted only a few minutes ; but after it was over, I shd have liked nothing better than rushing off somewhere and having a good cry ; instead of which I had to go back in a very tremulous state to the solemn drawing-room, where we sat round a table the rest of the evening, and were rather dull. I went to bed tired with excitement.
09Sep1863, A Bewitching Linsey
HAGLEY, Wednesday, September 9th, 1863.
—Mild and fine, but with something of the Novr. look and feel. My bathing-feel "va crescendo." I drove with At. E. and May to Stourbridge, and falling in love with a bewitching linsey, bought it against winter for 33s. ; 12 yds.
—Mild and fine, but with something of the Novr. look and feel. My bathing-feel "va crescendo." I drove with At. E. and May to Stourbridge, and falling in love with a bewitching linsey, bought it against winter for 33s. ; 12 yds.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)